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Old 02-08-2005, 07:21 AM   #1
Nihil Sine Deo
 
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Location: Franklin,Tennessee
Posts: 191
American Countryside (RC)

Ok, so I've been having a writers block for quite some time and I just seemed like nothing would come to me.. untill a few nights ago when i wrote this. Believe it or not it's kind of a Country song. I really do like it and plan on playing it for graduation. I'll see if i can make a descent recording soon and post it.

American Countryside

Verse
I live on a country road
a little hick town
that nobody knows
half the town are my relatives
or my friends, or my best friends kids
it's a crazy sitiation
from confirmation to graduation
but I'll always remember
where i'm from, this september

Chorus
when I
Take the stage
and I
Remove the cage
and I
Start this whole new life
and I'll
Look the Crowd
and I'll
Make ya Proud
and I'll
Always walk with Pride
In this American Coutryside

Verse
Ya,Help me move to my dorm room
with 2 small beds
and no extra room
and you'll leave with tears in your eyes
and i'll have to say
some extra goodbyes
but, don't fret about me
cause in four years
you'll be as proud as can be
you're little boy is now a man
and he's off to explore
the brand new land

(Instrumental Bridge)

Chorus
where I
Take the stage
and I
Remove the cage
and I
Start this whole new life
and I'll
Look the Crowd
and I'll
Make ya Proud
and I'll
Always walk with Pride
In this American Coutryside
American Countryside..

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Old 02-09-2005, 07:36 AM   #2
Nihil Sine Deo
 
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Man, My song must ROCK!! Noone's critiqueing!
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Old 02-09-2005, 02:37 PM   #3
is only a man
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PowerofHymn
Man, My song must ROCK!! Noone's critiqueing!
Well, I really doubt that it rocks, seeing as you said that it was a country song

But seriously, the verses are good, simple but they will probably mean more to your friends and family that you're apparently writing this for. The chorus on the other hand, has a few cliches and the American countryside reference comes out of nowhere. Sorry that this is rather short, I'll come back later and elaborate on some specifics if you'd like.
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Old 02-09-2005, 09:22 PM   #4
Nihil Sine Deo
 
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Yeah, I know American Countryside comes out of nowhere in the chorus, but one thing that I forgot to say is that I live in the middle of nowhere... Nebraska. On a farm and go to a school with a bunch of hicks (including me) so it's all good. The song so far has meant a lot to all of the kids at school, but I need to add one for verse or tweak the chorus a bit.. any suggestions?
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