I dunno...

ChrisHarbison · 01-26-2005, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SamR

I would think that the 2 of you being christians would eliminate some of the bigger issues (including abortion and gay marriage) but I also couldn't date someone who was a liberal or a slob or something like that.

I think that's the whole point...they are both Christians - one of them apparently has no problem with abortion or gay marriage and the other does.

sparklystuff · 01-26-2005, 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SamR

I would think that the 2 of you being christians would eliminate some of the bigger issues (including abortion and gay marriage) but I also couldn't date someone who was a liberal or a slob or something like that.

not necessarily. I know a few christians, that are pro-gay marriage. I don't think I've ever met one that was pro-choice though. Christians can often times be VERY liberal.

sparklystuff · 01-26-2005, 12:37 PM

Alright, this story may or may not help.

I have two friends that have been dating for about 2 years now. The guy, we'll call him Sam, I have known for about 6 years, and his girlfriend, we'll call Sally, for about 2. Sam began dating Sally and she wasn't a Christian. She fortunately accepted Christ during their dating relationship, but is still very weak in her faith. She was raised very liberal, and believes that people are born gay, there's nothing they can do, and should be able to get married. Sam on the other hand has been raised in a christian home, and has obviously been raised that it is not ok for gay people to be married. Sally is adamant on this issue, and he is adamant the other way. You know how they deal with the issue? They avoid it completely. They never talk about it...it's a sad reality.

So, I guess if are willing to live like that, avoiding talking about things, then I guess. But I don't believe that's right.

botruckin · 01-26-2005, 02:33 PM

I couldn't date or marry anybody that thought that gay marriage was ok and that abortion was ok. If I believed that it was ok to have abortions and gay marriage was ok and she did not I couldn't marry or dater her either. I think that if you believe in such different ways it could be made to work but it wouldn't be easy and it would deffinately cause arguments and fights when things such as voting came up. I wouldn't do it but that's just my opinion!

Blindman · 01-26-2005, 02:57 PM

If you are dating someone who has a different viewpoint on abortion, then at the very least you need to agree with each other that if you ended up married, she would never consider getting an abortion. But getting along even if you have different beliefs, say, about whether abortion should be legal, is still quite possible. I've found that I can get along with Christians with almost any beliefs on issues like this, as long as they have the same sort of faith that I have. Beliefs are only a matter of right or wrong; faith, on the other hand, is the difference between saved and damned. Sharing the same faith is infinitely more important than holding identical beliefs.

Symbiotic · 01-26-2005, 06:17 PM

so the best thing top do is to try to not talk about it?....or what?...instead of a whole write-up....i just want all of you to simply say "stay" or "split"...it probably won't affect the outcome of our relationship, but i'd just like to see what most people would think..

***BillSPrestonEsq*** · 01-26-2005, 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by guitarman_888

so the best thing top do is to try to not talk about it?....or what?...instead of a whole write-up....i just want all of you to simply say "stay" or "split"...it probably won't affect the outcome of our relationship, but i'd just like to see what most people would think..

I think blindman hit it on the head, though the more conservative one may treat this as a watershed issue.

Symbiotic · 01-26-2005, 07:46 PM

i like his answer....cause i don't want to break up....i'll just keep thinking about this one....

Blindman · 01-26-2005, 09:05 PM

Also consider that "we know in part" not in full; our knowledge of God and understanding of the world is never perfect, and as both of you grow as Christians it is quite likely that one of you will change your beliefs, or that you'll both change... beliefs aren't an unchanging part of us, which is why making permanent choices based on impermanent character traits isn't a good idea.

Symbiotic · 01-26-2005, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blindman

Also consider that "we know in part" not in full; our knowledge of God and understanding of the world is never perfect, and as both of you grow as Christians it is quite likely that one of you will change your beliefs, or that you'll both change... beliefs aren't an unchanging part of us, which is why making permanent choices based on impermanent character traits isn't a good idea.

so you say stick it out for a while?

botruckin · 01-27-2005, 09:51 AM

If you want a " stick with it" or a "split" then my simple answer is stick with it and work it out.

SilverNitrate · 01-27-2005, 09:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by guitarman_888

so you say stick it out for a while?

I wouldn't... but that's because I only see disaster coming out of the situation. But then again... my ability to only see disaster is because of my past relationship(s) where we had similar (yet not the same) disagreements on important issues. Therefore, I would say "split".

Blindman · 01-27-2005, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by guitarman_888

so you say stick it out for a while?

If you both have enough humility to admit uncertainty, it shouldn't be a problem. But I would reiterate that you at least have to decide that if you ever became a married couple, you wouldn't consider abortion as an option.