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Old 11-03-2004, 09:30 PM   #1
gazeintothefaceofmadness
 
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what's it worth?
A new York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him "What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?" The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street." Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the record, and after a moment Gabriel affirmed that this was true.

Saint Peter said, "Well , that's fine, but it's not really quite enough to get you into Heaven." The Lawyer said, "Wait Wait! There's more! Three years ago I also gave a homeless person a quarter." Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who after a moment nodded back, affirming this, too, had been verified.

Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we do with this fellow?"

Gabriel gave the Lawyer a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter,

"Let's give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell."

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San Antonio, by Naomi Shihab Nye

Tonight I lingered over your name,
the delicate assembly of vowels
a voice inside my head.
You were sleeping when I arrived.
I stood by your bed
and watched the sheets rise gently.
I knew what slant of light
would make you turn over.
It was then I felt
the highways slide out of my hands.
I remembered the old men
in the west side cafe,
dealing dominoes like magical charms.
It was then I knew,
like a woman looking backward,
I could not leave you,
or find anyone I loved more.
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Old 11-04-2004, 09:47 AM   #2
Me and my brother <3
 
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shocking!
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So if you're waiting for love/well it's a promise I'll keep/if you don't mind believing that it changes everything/then time will never matter/
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Old 11-04-2004, 02:18 PM   #3
I want an accoustic Bass
 
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funny, i pity saint peter and gabriel for having to deal with him.
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Old 11-04-2004, 10:09 PM   #4
is anonymous.
 
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I wonder if they know about these jokes. I wonder if they think these jokes are funny if they know about these jokes. I wonder if they tell these jokes and think these jokes are funny if they know about these jokes. I wonder if they laugh when they tell these jokes if they tell these jokes and think these jokes are funny if they know about these jokes. I wonder if there are jokes in heaven. I wonder if they know about these jokes in heaven if there are jokes in heaven. I wonder if these are the jokes they tell if there are jokes in heaven. I wonder if they tell these jokes and think these jokes are funny if there are jokes in heaven. I wonder if they laugh when they tell these jokes and think the jokes are funny if they know about these jokes and tell jokes in heaven. I wonder if there are jokes in heaven...




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Old 11-05-2004, 11:02 AM   #5
I want an accoustic Bass
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunkist
I wonder if they know about these jokes. I wonder if they think these jokes are funny if they know about these jokes. I wonder if they tell these jokes and think these jokes are funny if they know about these jokes. I wonder if they laugh when they tell these jokes if they tell these jokes and think these jokes are funny if they know about these jokes. I wonder if there are jokes in heaven. I wonder if they know about these jokes in heaven if there are jokes in heaven. I wonder if these are the jokes they tell if there are jokes in heaven. I wonder if they tell these jokes and think these jokes are funny if there are jokes in heaven. I wonder if they laugh when they tell these jokes and think the jokes are funny if they know about these jokes and tell jokes in heaven. I wonder if there are jokes in heaven...
a bit to much...
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Old 11-05-2004, 06:17 PM   #6
Psalms 137:9
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CristianBassist
a bit to much...
Or... Not enough?
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Old 11-05-2004, 06:50 PM   #7
I want an accoustic Bass
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mattslope
Or... Not enough?
too much, definitely...
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Old 11-05-2004, 06:56 PM   #8
Psalms 137:9
 
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Wow. CristianBassist has the funnies locked down.
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Old 11-05-2004, 07:08 PM   #9
OOOO
 
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Not funny.
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