How do i get my girlfriend back???

mraxeman · 08-16-2004, 07:12 PM

help me please!!!!!!!! Im desprate!!!!!!

i need a little advice from all of you out there girls and guyes.

My girlfriend says she dosent feel special anymore and now she wont even talk to me.

***BillSPrestonEsq*** · 08-16-2004, 07:13 PM

what happened?

mraxeman · 08-16-2004, 07:22 PM

She told me 5 weeks that she dosent feel special anymore but wants to be my friend
still. but she keeps on doggin me. I still love her but she wont even talk to me not on the phone computer or in person. i need help!

if your reading this courtney i love u

brown07 · 08-16-2004, 09:11 PM

The best chance you have to get her back is to let her go altogether. If she doesn't want to talk to you, chances are that she doesn't want to hear from you, either. Tell her that you are going to bow out of her life for as long as she wants you to. Make sure that she knows that you are bowing out, not because you don't care or want to be with her, but because you want her to be happy and have what she feels she needs and wants.

Then... follow through and bow out of her life. If she doesn't want you in her life, you don't have any right to be in her life.

If she's ever going to want to be with you again, the best way for her to find out is to have you out of her life. If she wants to be with you, she'll realize it and get back to you. If she doesn't want to be with you, then you're both a lot better off not being in contact.

Let her go. If she loves you, she'll be back. If she doesn't, then you're both better off.

bobthecockroach · 08-16-2004, 11:32 PM

I totally agree with Brown07.

If you really loved her, you'd respect her wishes.

Frodo · 08-17-2004, 08:23 AM

yes, speaking as a girl, which I am, if I didn't feel special towards someone anymore and told him so, I'd want him to give me a break. Just like if you're annoyed by one of your little siblings, you don't want them to keep coming back and saying they're sorry or what can they do, you want them to just leave you alone to collect yourself. And my guess is that she just needs some time to get her priorities straight. And if you don't end up as one of her priorities, don't take it personally, just know that that's not the person God has for you.

mraxeman · 08-17-2004, 06:04 PM

Hey guyes thanx you can all still post in here if u want

Deren · 08-17-2004, 07:29 PM

Granted the other people have great points, I just was wondering why or what made her feel "not specail" anymore.
Does she not relieze that love (if that is what it was) is more than a "specail feeling?" If all she wanted was to "feel special" then trust me dude, she was not the right one for you. If that specail feeling wares off or faded away chances are your definition of love and hers were different and you'd be better off without her.
Love is more than a feeling. It is a force without condition, a purpose without compromise and a hope that is founded in truth.
Peace,
-Deren

Frodo · 08-17-2004, 09:19 PM

wow, Deren, did you come up with that quote at the end by yourself, or did you find it somewhere? That's really good.

mraxeman · 08-18-2004, 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deren

Granted the other people have great points, I just was wondering why or what made her feel "not specail" anymore.
Does she not relieze that love (if that is what it was) is more than a "specail feeling?" If all she wanted was to "feel special" then trust me dude, she was not the right one for you. If that specail feeling wares off or faded away chances are your definition of love and hers were different and you'd be better off without her.
Love is more than a feeling. It is a force without condition, a purpose without compromise and a hope that is founded in truth.
Peace,
-Deren

Yo Deren,

i donnu y she dont feel special anymore maby its my aweful spelling LOL,
She gave me a note that said that at first she felt really cool and very special like i was the olny one that ever made her feel that way. but than about 5 weeks ago she said that it felt like a fake T.V. show where the producer tells you what to do and what to say. then she said that she wants to still be my friend. now she wont even talk to me kinda like shes mad at me for i dont know what?????

Help always welcome!
may God bless you and keep you safe!!!

Deren · 08-19-2004, 06:19 PM

The quote was completly original, I just made it up for emphisis that LOVE is not just (and the least bit of) a feeling.
My opinon may be old fashoined but I hope it is at least biblical.

I'm sorry to hear this happened to you, my guess is that she wans't really sinceer in persuing a relationship with you, but rather was interested in that "missing feeling" that only a relationship can fill. The kind of "I'm wanted feeling" and I know its a GREAT feeling.
However my defintion of love tramples just having a "warm feeling" and goes much deeper to that of trust, need and companionship. The warmness is perminant. Here it sounded like that she was only skin deep and a bit shallow in that aspect of what love could be (again by my standards which are probably different than others, so I'm not judging here)

I still stand that you are better off without her because if she couldn't even feel specail for five weeks (the least amount of love) then she had no real love for you in the first place. You deserve the real thing.
Best of luck and God bless.
-Deren

ChrisHarbison · 08-20-2004, 12:54 AM

mraxeman,

Welcome to the world of woment my friend.

Rather I should say, welcome to the world of adolescent woment my friend.

Fact is, you had a crush and you felt stronger for her than she felt for you. It's over. It hurts, I've been there, we all have - but it's over, time to move on. You'll find someone else, we all do. Then, when you meet that right person, this girl will look like less than nothing compared to her. I can promise you that's the truth.

Ali4God · 08-20-2004, 07:14 PM

I don't want this to sound harsh, but from a female perspective... it sounds like an excuse. It sounds like she was just trying to find some way to justify getting out of the relationship (for whatever reason).

Real relationships change... they go up and down. Sometimes you feel special, sometimes you feel like the same-ol-you... but as Deren said: that isn't what love is about. Sounds to me like either there is something else there that she isn't sharing with you.

*Alison*

Deren · 08-20-2004, 08:39 PM

I think Chris hit it on the head, I have been there myself. I've only dated one girl before my amazing relationship I'm having now. I felt really bad when we broke up, she just "changed too" Turns out her ex came back and she still liked him or something.
Four months later I met the girl of my dreams.
I don't think she was right for you and I understand it seems difficult. Don't try to get her back becausse she obviously isn't serious. You have great potential and lots to offer, God will use that for a perfect match.
Good luck,
-Deren

mraxeman · 08-23-2004, 07:06 PM

yo all what do u think when she says that she just sees me as a bigger brother
thanx lots