[hapa_angel]

Originally Posted by nards

Hey Rachel, at least you know what he thinks and you don't have to keep guessing.

Yeahhh....... wellllll.....
*fighting the urge to use the word 'but...'*
*gives up and shakes her head sadly*

Originally Posted by HeavenOnAStick

Use < and > instead of [ and ]

Got it. Thanx.
I can't for the life of me figure out why I can't remember something like that.... Hmm.

Originally Posted by bigpirate

You know, I don't know why, but God has been making it blatantly obvious that the girl I like, while being totally awesome, is not someone I should be talking to like that right now anyway, and the great thing is all of this has just gone through my mind and not out of my mouth to her ears yet.

So if she did come up to me, even though I totally like her, I would have to make sure we were just friends too...

But... you could still tell her and just have you 2 not do anything about it...




Ahhhhhh okaay, I need to learn to shut up and stop trying to meddle. I make my own problems worse when I do that, so I should stop trying to "fix" other's problems too! *slaps forehead* Sorry.
(but that's my opinion, anyway.)

Originally Posted by bigpirate

So I say that to let you know that your dude, ****, is most likely not just skirting the issue or anything... it may be harder for him than for you!

The thing is, I'm nearly positive he doesn't have the same feelings for me that I have for him. He just now let me know he was sorta attracted to me, he didn't even let that out before just recently, so that doesn't exactly signal the whole "using-your-heart-instead-of-your-head" type of thinking that usually goes on when one is totally smitten with someone. (YES, I'm speaking from experience...! *sigh* )
I think the real thing that's bugging me is... I've been thru this whole rejection thing once before... but now I'm having to deal with it again, but in a different way. I'd tried to bury my feelings for him all through the rest of my high school years, and now it's all coming back up to haunt me with this little episode. Just goes to show you how much I'd gotten over him. In Chinese: Ai-yah, janhai mah faahn, ah! (Oh dear, so much trouble, huh!)

Originally Posted by bigpirate

But the bible says that we can do so much more for God when we don't have someone else to worry about (i.e. girl/boyfriend, future spouse).

Yea... I agree with this... see above quote in Chinese.

*but hey, it'd be nice if he did feel the same way...*

____________________________________________________
Enough About The Saga Already... On To The Journaling!

School started back up today. I start at EIGHT in the MORNING because yes, I'm crazy.... Stupid me. I know I'm just gonna end up showing up late to every class by the time we're halfway into the semester. Oh, whatever. I give up. I'll stay enrolled.
(The real problem is I'm such a night owl.... Maybe I should move to Hong Kong someday. You can be a night owl there and no one thinks anything of it- in fact, all the shops and eateries are still open really late into the night. Plus they speak English, so I don't have to embarass myself with my pidgeon Chinglish. But I digress. )

I'm taking Women's Health, Early Western Civilization, Beginning Swimming, Astronomy- The Planets, and Chem for Nonscientists (online). Oh, and two other courses to fulfill AmeriCorps requirements, but those are easy, nothingness "Child Development work experience" classes. They're just trying to take my money in order to fund the program. Oh well- I'm getting my credits, so I'll not complain, so long as it gets me out of here sooner.

From first impressions, I think have a couple of good teachers. I like my Western Civ teacher- he's knowledgeable about the topic and quite engaged when he gets going- and my swimming teacher b/c he's just nice. The world needs more teachers like that. But as for the other classes... My health teacher is nice enough, but I have a permanent question-mark in my head about that class overall, after reading a bit into the book. Let's just say there are some topics I'd feel much more comfortable discussing at Bethany where I know for sure I'll not be the only one with certain opinions on certain topics. *sigh* And then there's my Planets teacher.... Sure, she's nice enough, but she seems green yet. Maybe I've just been taking too much teacher prep for AmeriCorps, but I can tell she hasn't been teaching all that long, and if she has, she hasn't matured to the stage where she knows exactly what she should be doing and when. She just seems quite unused to the idea of talking to a large audience (we were in a good-sized room and she was using a tinny little voice to talk to all those people) and like she knows about the subject but not quite the best way of how to convey it all to everyone. But we shall soon see.

Cool Song List:
1. What Happened To Us?- Hoobastank
2. Goodbye To You (the ORIGINAL version on Broken Bracelet, not the one on The Spirit Room)- Michelle Branch
3. Just One- Hoobastank
4. Unaffected- Hoobastank

(Can you tell I really like that CD? Heh. I was listening to it with my friend Daniel today and he was like, "This is like sk8er-punk. This could totally make the soundtrack to some Tony Hawk video game or something." Oh, man. Does this mean I gotta get me a board now and learn some tricks? Hehe.)



Oh, one other thing.... I wonder about this but I'd like opinions first... Should I post more of my poetry on the Lit board? No one's commented on the last one, I don't know whether that's bad or it just means no one's looked (which is bad to me!) or cares to comment b/c they think it's all the same... opinions, please?

2 days!
-Rachel

[bigpirate]

But... you could still tell her and just have you 2 not do anything about it...

I will if the time is right, and if not it is no big deal... honestly, now that I kinda came to the realization I did, I kinda don't care about it any more... I like her, but I can deal with stuff without telling her or being with her or anything.

so that doesn't exactly signal the whole "using-your-heart-instead-of-your-head" type of thinking that usually goes on when one is totally smitten with someone. (YES, I'm speaking from experience...! *sigh* :rolleyes

You want somebody who is totally goo-goo over ya like this instead of someone who is totally into God first and will wait until God tells him he can date and show feelings and stuff?

School started back up today. I start at EIGHT in the MORNING because yes, I'm crazy.... Stupid me. I know I'm just gonna end up showing up late to every class by the time we're halfway into the semester. Oh, whatever. I give up. I'll stay enrolled.

I have that same problem, even with the 9 o clock class... this is the first day I showed up on time for it!

(The real problem is I'm such a night owl.... Maybe I should move to Hong Kong someday. You can be a night owl there and no one thinks anything of it- in fact, all the shops and eateries are still open really late into the night. Plus they speak English, so I don't have to embarass myself with my pidgeon Chinglish. But I digress. )

My problem also... I just kinda don't sleep well early, and my mind works awesome late... i have written all of my best songs while asleep.

Let's just say there are some topics I'd feel much more comfortable discussing at Bethany where I know for sure I'll not be the only one with certain opinions on certain topics.

hey, a chance to be bold and stand up for what you believe in... pray about it already!

Cool Song List:

You know, I have not heard much of their stuff, but from the three songs I have heard (crawling in the dark, running away, and with you, which is totally awesome!) I don't picture them as sk8er punk.

Oh, one other thing.... I wonder about this but I'd like opinions first... Should I post more of my poetry on the Lit board? No one's commented on the last one, I don't know whether that's bad or it just means no one's looked (which is bad to me!) or cares to comment b/c they think it's all the same... opinions, please?

MORE MORE MORE!!! I just don't post cause I feel silly, cause I don't know much... I posted poetry in there, and I am glad that it has gotten views and no one has decided it must die

[SmileAndFollow]

Originally Posted by hapa_angel

Oh, one other thing.... I wonder about this but I'd like opinions first... Should I post more of my poetry on the Lit board? No one's commented on the last one, I don't know whether that's bad or it just means no one's looked (which is bad to me!) or cares to comment b/c they think it's all the same... opinions, please?

I say post more. I will go look and offer any comments I have now.

[Choppa™]

hapa_angel said: Oh, one other thing.... I wonder about this but I'd like opinions first... Should I post more of my poetry on the Lit board? No one's commented on the last one, I don't know whether that's bad or it just means no one's looked (which is bad to me!) or cares to comment b/c they think it's all the same... opinions, please?

You should continue to post. Your post count needs the help

[hapa_angel]

Yes, I am! *cheers*


My friend Toni remembered!!! Right when I walked into Sunday School she piped up with a big, "Happy birthday, Rachel!" Gotta love that girl. Heh. Five of us went to lunch at M's cafe on Ninth and Irving St. (If you live near SF you know where that is.) They insisted on paying, which was so nice of them! It was only like, $5, spread out 4 ways, but hey- free lunch is free lunch!

Only saw **** twice today- once when I walked in and sat down, and once more when we all piled into my friend Alan's Audi and I spotted him across the street.... boo. I was hoping for a "hi" , since I "told" him it was my bday. Oh well.

ARGH my mom's calling... no, seriously. And we all know what that means....



More 2m!
-Rachel

[bigpirate]

Happy Belated Birthday!!!

[SmileAndFollow]

Happy birthday! I missed it... Sorry. How does it feel?

[hapa_angel]

Awww, shmanks you two! *I feel wubbed!*



*Ai-yah... too long in those dank, airless classrooms...*

Lol.

_________________________
So anyways...

I have rediscovered my book Boundaries In Dating, and none too soon. Eh.... maybe I should've been reading that all along. (Except that Purpose-Driven Life kinda got in the way. My whole college department's been reading through that one.) My mom bought me the BID a few years ago. I read it, and it's been sitting on my shelf ever since, next to my old, large student Bible that I haven't cracked open since I got my "dinky Bible" this year. 'Bout time I cracked that sucker open, what with all the... shall we say "recent happenings."



I was going to tune my guitar, wasn't I? Oh, yeah. That's what I went online for.
*goes to www.WholeNote.com*

-Rachel

[bigpirate]

You tune your guitar on the internet? That is crazy! I usually just put in a CD and tune to it and play along.

I am a loser, yes, but it does make for hours of fun!

[HeavenOnAStick]

I just use my tuner. I'm lazy like that, and awful at doing it by ear.

[hapa_angel]

Originally Posted by bigpirate

You tune your guitar on the internet? That is crazy! I usually just put in a CD and tune to it and play along.

On WholeNote, there's an online tuner. I couldn't use my keyboard b/c my dad was asleep and I didn't wanna wake him up, so I dragged my guitar downstairs and *voila* I discovered it was out of tune. (As almost always. I should get new strings. )

Originally Posted by HeavenOnAStick

I just use my tuner. I'm lazy like that, and awful at doing it by ear.

I kinda don't have a tuner... I just never got one, since I had my keyboard and knew I could figure out how to tune it by ear after a bit. Unfortunately I still haven't quite got that "by ear" part down pat. (Nor did I get that computer mic yet. *still kinda bugging mom & dad to take me to Best Buy for a shopping spree*)

________________________________________

I skipped out on the kids today, which is kinda bad. This was the one day of the week when I could be there to help out and I didn't go. I kinda feel a bit bad about it... but what can I do? They get Chinese New Year off- Thursday- and the next day is "staff development day" which just means that they didn't want everyone to have to come back so they gave them a 4-day weekend. And I have class every Tues/Thurs.

I was just tooooo tired this morning... I had a Child Development class meeting last night after my other classes, so I was basically up at 6:30 AM, at school from 8 AM to about 7 PM and finally fell asleep... oh, about 1? 2? Argh... I need to learn how to sleep before midnight. It's been awhile...

I got another class meeting later- about 6 till 7 tonight- so I better go and get some dinner before I head out. Laterzzzz......

-Rachel

[HeavenOnAStick]

Originally Posted by hapa_angel

(As almost always. I should get new strings. )

Me too... my strings are over 2 years old (except for the G, which I snapped while practicing for an FCA meeting, and neither me or my friend had a G, so we replaced with with a B and tuned down).

[SmileAndFollow]

Originally Posted by HeavenOnAStick

Me too... my strings are over 2 years old (except for the G, which I snapped while practicing for an FCA meeting, and neither me or my friend had a G, so we replaced with with a B and tuned down).

2 year old strings on a guitar? Ive had almost a year old strings on a bass, but I had to change them because they lose all their brightness, and once one breaks you should replace them all on a bass.

[Choppa™]

That's true. There's hardly any good in playing guitars with old strings. New strings add so much tone and brightness.

[HeavenOnAStick]

It's never been a real urgent thing for me. Since I've only played in front of people with that guitar twice (at the FCA meeting, and once when our youth group went camping). And if I need to, a lot of my friends have nice acoustics.

And that plus the fact that I have never really had the extra money to shell out (I could get the money if I really needed new strings, but I can do without) means I probably won't be getting new strings for a while.