[broken robot]

Hey guys, this poem is a little, well a lot different than anything else I have written. I am trying to expand my horizons a tad. lol. I would like to know if I am on the right track, what I can do to improve in the future, and anything that I can improve on this poem. All, all, input is apreciated. Thanks again...

derek



pink sunset rises in the southern sky
beckons in with open arms to sit
outside and bask in the beauty
the sun will rise and expose the city
only night can hid the emptiness
wounded children will play in your streets
vacant buildings leave voids unseen before
beautiful from a distance; only in the dark
artificial light dies, distance no longer hides
wouldn’t let anyone to close; you always knew
your heart and soul were unlike mine

what is isn’t what was
what was isn’t what is

empty words, empty paper
empty wounds, empty heart
empty lights, empty life

it is undeniable
you are beautiful
but it can’t compare
because you aren’t

broken words
broken hearts
broken lights

breaking is fixing
breathing is exhaling
beginning is ending
becoming is unbecoming