That's More Than I Could Say (RC)

**Skeeter** · 09-23-2002, 05:16 PM

I went home from University for the weekend and while watching a Coldplay special on MuchMusic had some lyrics pop into my mind. I quickly turned off the TV as I can't write my own thoughts with other's blaring at me. Here's what I have so far:

That's More Than I Could Say

I climbed inside
To lose myself in you
But I knew
It was all inside my mind
I was torn apart
By things I used to do
But I knew
That's where I always start

I recognised your faults
But loved you just the same
I gave it all I thought
My mind was prearranged

Chorus:
That's more than I could say
For you

Without tonight
I don't know what I would've done
I begun
To fade away from sight
I saw myself
Above the human race
I erased
All that I knew from someone else

I gave it all for me
I thought I could pretend
To be all I need
A means to an end

Chorus

Bridge:
Heave sigh
Pollsters cry
We're all confused
And wondering why
Can't connect
Mind's a wreck
Where are the friends
I intersect
Pretend
To love again
When all we want is
Affirmation
Selfish
Maury Povich
Talk show hosts
As they're talking cringe

We hide away
From the crowd
I am not an island
Off by myself
I have to give up my own ways
To be with you
Then what's this obfuscation
I eschew

leahsplace · 09-23-2002, 08:00 PM

whoa that was mind-boggling, but it made me think!!
It was really long...but thats not a bad thing!
I would ask you questions about it but I would have to know you b/c I have a question about everything...
it's cool though!!
I like it.....you used big words..that was great

Leah

"BrooksB" · 09-23-2002, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by skeeter_dan
...obfuscation...

that's one heck of a word there, man!

anyways...I like it alright... I guess my only criticism would be that the rythm seemed a little awkward at times, like in the first part of the second verse. And there wasn't much imagery, which may have been your intention.

**Skeeter** · 09-23-2002, 10:21 PM

All it means in confusion...it's actually a little joke on myself as I confused myself with this song. I have no flippin' clue what it means. To "eschew obfuscation" is to avoid confusion. So I threw in a little joke at the end...

Actually, I guess it talks about how the emphasis in society has been on the self. The whole "I am a rock, I am an island" mentality. Even in relationships people tend to look only at what they want for themselves. So I guess this song attacks selfishness and the whole self-help mentality. Or maybe I'm completely wrong. Help me out here...

Just thought I'd add: I really like the bridge, mainly because I threw it together as I was typing it up. I realised it need a bridge just before I posted it, and that bridge came out. Actually, it's more of a tag as the song kinda ends after it...

"BrooksB" · 09-24-2002, 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by skeeter_dan
All it means in confusion...it's actually a little joke on myself as I confused myself with this song. I have no flippin' clue what it means. To "eschew obfuscation" is to avoid confusion. So I threw in a little joke at the end...

if anyone asks, it's irony, not a joke

**Skeeter** · 09-24-2002, 10:13 PM

That's the word I was thinking of! I can't believe I couldn't think of that word...irony, irony, irony...sheesh.

Wobbit · 09-24-2002, 11:40 PM

thats AWESOME dan
you're songs have been amazing me lately

good stuff
the only thing i don't like is the maury povich reference, thats kinda lame. but everything else is PRO
very cool

cool_E · 09-25-2002, 08:53 AM

RC...

That's More Than I Could Say

I climbed inside
To lose myself in you
interesting opening, good job

But I knew
It was all inside my mind
I was torn apart
"torn apart" is cliche

By things I used to do
But I knew
That's where I always start

I recognised your faults
But loved you just the same
I gave it all I thought
My mind was prearranged
prearranged is a seriously bad forced rhyme

Chorus:
That's more than I could say
For you

Without tonight
I don't know what I would've done
I begun
"I've" ?

To fade away from sight
I saw myself
Above the human race
I erased
All that I knew from someone else

I gave it all for me
I thought I could pretend
To be all I need
A means to an end
cliche

Chorus

Bridge:
Heave sigh
Pollsters cry
We're all confused
And wondering why
Can't connect
Mind's a wreck
Where are the friends
I intersect
Pretend
To love again
When all we want is
Affirmation
Selfish
Maury Povich
Talk show hosts
As they're talking cringe

We hide away
From the crowd
I am not an island
Off by myself
I have to give up my own ways
To be with you
Then what's this obfuscation
I eschew
the language you've chosen here will serve
to obfuscate your point

Some good & interesting stuff in there.

Keep writing...

**Skeeter** · 09-25-2002, 12:01 PM

Hmm, you have some good points which I'll have to consider. However, two of them don't really apply. It's "I begun" because it's in the past tense. If it was in the present it would be "I've". And the obfuscation is meant to be part of the irony...kinda.

cool_E · 09-25-2002, 12:03 PM

you better check your English text book.

it would properly be

I began

or

I've begun

Of course, as a writer you can do what you like

**Skeeter** · 09-25-2002, 12:26 PM

Hmm, you might be right. "Begun" is the past participle of begin...nuts...oh well, I prefer the sound of "I begun"...