[swim2112]

For thousands of years, men have tried to understand the rules when dealing with women. Finally, this merit/demerit guide will help you to understand just how it works.

Remember, in the world of romance, one single rule applies:
Make the woman happy.

Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the points system:


SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed .............................................+1
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows.... 0
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets...................-1
You leave the toilet seat up..................................-5
You replace the toilet paper roll when it is empty............ 0
When the toilet paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex...-1
When the Kleenex runs out you use the next bathroom...........-2
You go out to buy her breakfast to be served in bed.....+5
In the snow...................................................+8
But return with a six pack of soda............................-5
And forget the breakfast.............................................-25
You check out a suspicious noise at night..................... 0
You check out a suspicious noise and it is nothing............ 0
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something..........+5
You whack it with a six iron................................+10
It's her cat.................................................-40


HER BIRTHDAY
You remember her birthday................................0
You buy a card and flowers...............................0
You take her out to dinner.............................. 0
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar....+1
Okay, it is a sports bar................................-2
And it's all-you-can-eat night..........................-3
And your face is painted the colors of your best team........-10


A NIGHT OUT WITH HER
You take her to a movie...............+2
You take her to a movie she likes.....+4
You take her to a movie you hate......+6
You take her to a movie you like......-2
It's called Death Cop 3...............-3
Which features Cyborgs that eat humans....-9
You told her it was a foreign film about orphans.....-15



THE BIG QUESTION
She asks, "Does this dress make me look fat?"
You hesitate in responding......................-10
You reply, "Where?".............................-35
You reply, "No, I think it's your butt".........-100
Any other response..............................-20



COMMUNICATION
When she wants to talk about a problem: You listen, displaying a concerned expression...........0
You listen, for over 30 minutes...............+5
You relate to her problem and share a similar experience....+50
You're mind wanders to sports and you suddenly hear her saying "well, what do you think I should do"...............-50
You listen for 30 minutes without looking at the TV..+100
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep............-200

[SenorPapaCabasa]

Haha, thats funny.....




Let me tally up my score. Looks like about.............-200

[MrCrabby]

Haha!

I like the "do i look fat?" part!!:klol: :klol: :klol:

[Kati]

You check out a suspicious noise and it is something..........+5
You whack it with a six iron................................+10
It's her cat.................................................-40

Hahaha!!

[punkrawker]

hehehe. good stuff.

[MrCrabby]

I'm usually on the plus side.
I pretty much get along with girls.

[GMartin2R]

that's great. I like it

[frostydv]

I flunked

[Cheat Me]

I like the cat part lol, I'm not real fond of cats




but anyways....the 'does my butt look fat?'...........hilarious...still laughing, my mom thinks somethings wrong with me lol........the movies lol cyborgs that eat humans....that's my kind of movie! I hate chickflicks lol


that was hilarious tho!:klol: :klol:

[swim2112]

I like the fat part too

[guitarman]

-789....oh boy.....

[swim2112]

-800 b/c you don't have any pants...

[guitarman]

LOL!!

Are you ever going to give my pants back??

[swim2112]

no...



I like them... they are red

[guitarman]

I want my pants back!!!