can i get some quick feedback.

**Josey Wales** · 11-29-2011, 07:31 AM

hey all, i didn't get any responses over in the CGR member's bands forum so i'm gonna post this here real fast to try to get some feedback,

AMAZING GRACE - G.I.V.E. (better mixed copy) - YouTube

let me know the good, bad, and the ugly...

don't hold back, i want to know whats up so i can bring it to our frontman so we can work on some things.

bobthecockroach · 11-29-2011, 08:07 AM

First of all, kudos for taking on a classic.

But I don't understand what I'm listening to.

At first, it sounded like Metallica playing a ballad. Then there was a strange, new melody which I don't think works at all. Then it turned into Relient K playing top 40 country.

Nevertheless, you guys sound great on your instruments. So while I may not get the arrangement, I like your playing.

martinedwards · 11-29-2011, 10:17 AM

not a fan of the new melody.

other than that, it's pretty good!

**Josey Wales** · 11-29-2011, 03:47 PM

thanks guys, i appreciate this info, it's something we can work on.

**Role Modlin** · 11-29-2011, 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobthecockroach

At first, it sounded like Metallica playing a ballad. Then there was a strange, new melody which I don't think works at all. Then it turned into Relient K playing top 40 country.

Maybe that's what they were shooting for?

**Rainer.** · 11-29-2011, 09:32 PM

The melody sounds like a result of the chord progression. Instead of the other way around. It doesn't feel right, and it never really resolves, it has no resting point. This makes the first minute and a half almost painfully drawn out and stagnant. One time through that part might be fine, but the longer intro just doesn't make sense in the song structure.

Once we get into the more rockish part of the song (the transition needs work, all the transitions need work, really), the "melody" sounds a lot more like a harmony part that was supposed to go under the melody that everyone knows. That makes it a bit strange to listen to. The problem with doing such a recognizable tune is that when you tweak it a bit, it doesn't seem right anymore. You either have to only alter it slightly, or really switch it up.

The guitar and keyboards are both filling the same sonic space, and doing the same thing. A lot more can be done with that...

If the single verse is going to be repeated that many times, it needs to change dynamically. Everything is just at the same level, doing the same things, the entire time. The song needs motion, contrast, shape! Write out the arrangement on a board using "Chorus" "Verse" "Intro", etc, and just put down some dynamics, loud/soft, busy/sparse, and see if you can make some really good contrasts happen.

**Josey Wales** · 11-30-2011, 08:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Role Modlin

Maybe that's what they were shooting for?

funny story, and i talked with randy, he never told me this but yes they were wanting to get that old country hymn to it..

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rainer.

The melody sounds like a result of the chord progression. Instead of the other way around. It doesn't feel right, and it never really resolves, it has no resting point. This makes the first minute and a half almost painfully drawn out and stagnant. One time through that part might be fine, but the longer intro just doesn't make sense in the song structure.

Once we get into the more rockish part of the song (the transition needs work, all the transitions need work, really), the "melody" sounds a lot more like a harmony part that was supposed to go under the melody that everyone knows. That makes it a bit strange to listen to. The problem with doing such a recognizable tune is that when you tweak it a bit, it doesn't seem right anymore. You either have to only alter it slightly, or really switch it up.

The guitar and keyboards are both filling the same sonic space, and doing the same thing. A lot more can be done with that...

If the single verse is going to be repeated that many times, it needs to change dynamically. Everything is just at the same level, doing the same things, the entire time. The song needs motion, contrast, shape! Write out the arrangement on a board using "Chorus" "Verse" "Intro", etc, and just put down some dynamics, loud/soft, busy/sparse, and see if you can make some really good contrasts happen.

thanks jon, this helps... but there is actually a really interesting story behind why the intro is so long, and what it goes into.