[rustyj52]

Hi, I have been attending a local church for around 3 years now, but my problem (if it is a problem) is that I have always been a private man, some would call me shy but I dont think that is the case; I am more of a loner; "How" do I overcome my not being able to mingle and enjoy the company of my fellow christians.
I dont know what to talk about and the attempts I have made end with a blank stare and silence!
I leave the church after the service looking back as I walk through the doors at feeling alone and not apart of the congregation; Its not their fault I have always been that way (arrive early leave as soon as it's over) but wishing I could have stayed.
The services are great and I feel lifted each time)
I know the lord called me as I am and I feel his love, so how do I give that love to others?
I am 61 years old so you would think I should be able to overcome this myself.
Thanks for reading the tread christian love to all Rob.

[bobthecockroach]

First of all, this "problem" spans all ages. I'm 25 and I often have problems mingling. I just don't feel comfortable approaching people I don't know. If they approach me, I'm fine, but I won't approach them.

What has helped me is making friends by attrition. What I mean by that is that I put myself in small group situations with the same people repeatedly until I'm so used to being around them that talking to them is easy in any situation.

Does your church have any kind of small groups that you could become a part of? Maybe just seeing the same people in a smaller setting a few times will help break the ice like it does for me.

[rustyj52]

Thanks for the advice, yes I attend home groups for bible studies and I have no problems talking about the bible and our lord but in church I just could not seem to mix and spend time with anyone. More people I quess?
So after a lot of prayer on sunday I took a deep breath and stayed after the service and chatted with a few people and it went well.
I dont know why I had not done it before? But I am so greatful for the lords help and I felt so much better going home.
Thank you for taking the time to answer me and try and help.
Bless you brother. Rob.