[BillSPrestonEsq]

Originally Posted by SupaNova

The thought's crossed my mind, certainly. Of course, the fact that there are no coffee shop type places of any sort in the area makes this sort of tricky. Or simply a reason to get creative

.....Do people actually ever talk about this kind of stuff before jumping into the dating realm of things? I know that sounds stupid, but now that I'm thinking about it, I can't think of anybody I know who had a conversation with the young lady instead of just asking her. The vast majority of advice I've ever gotten on this issue can essentially be compared to ripping off a band-aid or chanting a Nike slogan.

I did, but my general level of subtlety is often somewhere between a battering ram and a Sherman tank.

Personally, I might consider asking her to hang out.

YMMV. My wife said she knew that when I asked "if I could call her my girlfriend?" that we would end up married.

Movies, concerts, common interests are all good points of departure.

[Pre-Ex-Girlfriend]

Weighing in on the original question (how to get her to open up)... Just be yourself and let her be herself. It sounds silly, but I honestly think that all shy/closed off people need sometimes is someone to listen who won't be at all judgmental. And people in general just want to feel safe around their friends. Basically, just be nice.

[SupaNova]

Thanks for the replies everybody

I've been thinking and praying over this some more and...I'm going to pursue the "friend date" option. The important thing, I think, is to just be up-front about everything with her I invite her out. Still throughly convinced that we're months away from an actual relationship (assuming anything ever materializes on that front), but on the flipside, I don't think I'd be able to simply bottle all this up for the next few months. Not while acknowledging that keeping this quiet for so long could potentially be a waste of our time.

Honestly, I'd still prefer to just take things slow and see how events unfold, but perhaps that's simply fear talking.

[deana]

will keep you and your friend in my prayers... stay smiling