[Katze]

Originally Posted by Godslilrosebud

No, no, no, I don't think you're the fuse. I just think that the song applies to all of us at one time or another, and whoever is the "fuse" it fits. I'm not blaming you.

Understood.

You're right. I hadn't put two and two together before, but we've been talking about gossip recently. You're absolutely right, all I know is gossip. I want to understand.

That said, I think I understand more than you think. My dad and I are, shall we say, too much alike. Immovable Force meets Very Stubborn Object.

First, when I trust, I get burned, no matter who it is. There's only one person in this world that I trust entirely, and I regret even that sometimes, too. I really don't want to get into it all.

That said, I think you think you understand more than you really do. Even I don't understand all that's gone on here, nor do I wish to.

I'm sorry.

Thank you, but there's really no need to be.

So what bands do you listen to nowadays?

Anything punk, hardcore, scremo, metal, etc. I love the grunge.

EDIT: Okay. You know what? I'm done. I'm not going to try to force myself on you as a friend. I've lost two friends with this mess, and it hurts. I'm not going to keep pushing where I'm not wanted. You have my word that I will not talk about it to Sarah, or your mom, or my mom. If I talk to Sarah again.

It's your decision. You can tell me to go away,and I will. You can tell me to stop replying to your journals, and I will. If you want, I will add you to my ignore list. Or I will stay.

I love you, Ruth. I miss our friendship.

This is my last post unless you tell me otherwise.

I'm not trying to push you away as a friend, so long as you understand that you don't know every last thing, nor will you. Like I said earlier, trust is not something I do any more, period. I trusted my best friend once, and it came back to bite me later, and bit me hard. Right now, I just can't risk that anywhere, let alone posting everything like that on the internet where my mom could find it.

And how have you lost 2 friends? What's wrong with Sarah? Last I checked, nothing I said or did affected your friendship, and I know she could use a good friend or two.

I don't want you to to put me on your ignore list, and i figure that if I post anything here, you'll see it. I'd just like us both to see that our friendship has strayed since you moved, and that's just the way it is.

[Godslilrosebud]

Okay, that works!




Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo............................................. .....................


How's life?

[Katze]

Life is amazing. I have my drivers license now, as well as my own car.

Last night, Youth was absolutely amazing. The Spirit of the Lord was there, and changed the lives of all the kids. I played during the alter call, and played for a half-hour straight on already sore fingers. Tasha and I now both have blisters on our fingers, but it was well worth it.

[Godslilrosebud]

Lucky duck.


I get my permit as soon as I finish my 10th grade stuff (mid-May, I hope).

Car. That depends on where I go to college! If I go to BJU, I won't need a car. If I go to Patrick Henry, I may or may not. If I go to a junior college, I will need one!


College is more important to me right now than a car, though.

[Katze]

For me, work is more important than school, and I need a car to get to work. It's one thing to take the bus into school, it's another to try to coordinate work schedules around the bus schedule.

[Godslilrosebud]

Ha ha, yeah, true dat.


I'm leaning toward PHC at this point. Maybe Journalism.

[Katze]

PHC is WAAAY too conservative for me. I'd go nuts in about a week there. I spent 2 months there last year, and will probably be back for another film this year, but that's enough for me. Besides, they won't take my SLCC credit as transfer credit, and I really don't want to have to re-do that work. They're a good college for a typical sheltered conservative homeschool graduate who wants 4 more years of the same stuff.

In other news, the semester here at SLCC is over, thank God!! I have a final paper to write, and a math final to take, but those shouldn't be too bad. Graduation is on Friday, and no, I'm not graduating, I'm just working Graduation. Then, we leave for California for a few days, and then I move the week after I get back.

I have found a second job, but I have no idea how I'm going to make it fit time wise. I'm already stretched beyond anything I could have ever imagined, and I'll drop out of school if I have to to make it all work. I'm also getting more involved at my second church, and really praying about where God wants me to settle down.

Oh, did I mention my third job over the summer?

There may be something else coming up as well in my life, I'm not sure yet, but yet again, there's no time for it.

Dang.

I want sleep.

[Godslilrosebud]

Originally Posted by Katze

PHC is WAAAY too conservative for me. I'd go nuts in about a week there. I spent 2 months there last year, and will probably be back for another film this year, but that's enough for me. Besides, they won't take my SLCC credit as transfer credit, and I really don't want to have to re-do that work. They're a good college for a typical sheltered conservative homeschool graduate who wants 4 more years of the same stuff.

Oh, thanks a lot, I really appreciate that comment.[/sarcasm]

In other news, the semester here at SLCC is over, thank God!! I have a final paper to write, and a math final to take, but those shouldn't be too bad. Graduation is on Friday, and no, I'm not graduating, I'm just working Graduation. Then, we leave for California for a few days, and then I move the week after I get back.

I have found a second job, but I have no idea how I'm going to make it fit time wise. I'm already stretched beyond anything I could have ever imagined, and I'll drop out of school if I have to to make it all work. I'm also getting more involved at my second church, and really praying about where God wants me to settle down.

Oh, did I mention my third job over the summer?

There may be something else coming up as well in my life, I'm not sure yet, but yet again, there's no time for it.

Dang.

I want sleep.

You sound terribly stressed out. I think you need a pillow fight.

[Katze]

Originally Posted by Godslilrosebud

Oh, thanks a lot, I really appreciate that comment.[/sarcasm]


You sound terribly stressed out. I think you need a pillow fight.

Hey, any day. Thank my friend Will for the cynicism.

No, I'm not stressed, just busy. And a pillow fight would stress me out even more. I just need to take life one step at a time, rather than 20 steps at once. (note to self: Talk to Alex about this...)

[Godslilrosebud]

How about a food fight then?





Tell us about Alex?

[Katze]

Alex. He's, um, a special friend. We decided not to date right now, but our friendship is very close.

[Katze]

So, news update.

My Meet the Candidate show is going really, really well. After a week solid of shooting, and 2 weeks of capturing, importing, and editing, I now have 3 shows completed and airing. I should have 3 more shows done in about 8 hours worth of work time. Graduation is tomorrow, and no, I'm not graduating, but I'm Technical directing. I actually met the president of the college today, and she was impressed that the TDing was being done by a student, rather than one of the staff members.

Last night, I found out that I am indeed debating next year. I've eluded to this a bit in my blog, but never outright said it. NCFCA means so much to me, and it was next to impossible to let go of it for good. I've been working towards this for almost 3 months, and now have an answer. Jason (my sister's partner 2 years ago) and I are going to be debating together, and it's pretty much the best team that this state can put together. I still don't know how I'm going to pay for all of it, but I'm saving my money like crazy now. The resolution will be announced in June (gasp, 6 weeks away) and then it's off to researching and preping like crazy for the next 8, probably 10, hopefully 12 months, depending on how far Jason and I make it in competition.

My dad and I leave tomorrow noon for San Diego, where I'll drop him off on the Pacific Crest Trail. The trail has been a dream of his since he was 12, and he's finally able to live his dream. He wanted to go last year, but it didn't work, so he's trying this time. In his apartment right now is 5 months worth of food, dehydrated, and vacuum-packed, sitting in about 2 dozen boxes all with labels of where and when to send them. After losing my whole family last year, it's hard to see him leave, and I don't know how I'll function without him, but I'm so happy he's going. I'm so proud of my dad, I can't even put it into words.
We leave straight from work tomorrow, drive all day, and he starts on Sunday. I'll spend Sunday and Monday with friends in the San Diego and LA area, and then drive back Tuesday. Then, I'm moving into his apartment for the summer, mail him food, and transcribe his journals when he mails them back home.
In the mean time, my amazing friends, Ben, George, and Phil L. have offered to help me with anything from mailing re-supplies while I'm out of town, to fixing my car for me. They're great, God is good.

News item number next: I put a guitar on layaway today. I've been promising myself for a year now that I'd get a guitar, and after losing my other one last fall, I've wanted an acoustic guitar for a while. I'm currently borrowing 2, one from the family I'm staying with, and another from a friend, but I've got to return the first when I move into my dad's place, and my friend needs his back soon, too. Plus, I've got a missions trip coming up in *gasp* 6 weeks, and I'll need it for that. It's a beautiful Epiphone, with a cutaway. It's not the nicest thing, but only $200. All the guitars cheaper than that were pretty junky, and I can't afford anything nicer. I went to the shop to get a set of strings, and looked at the acoustics as long as I was there. When I was at a different guitar store last week, I didn't see any acoustics that really caught my eye, but this one was different. I played with it for a minute, and then pretty much fell in love with it. MK, this is pathetic, I just wrote more about a freaking guitar than I did my dad. Hmmm, maybe I should re-ajust my priorities.....

The kitten Kelly got for Christmas has turned into a ill-behaved brat. I'm currently wearing a skirt, 'cuz my jeans are in the wash, and he's climbing up it and scratching my upper thighs. Time to look up Kitten Chow Mien recipies.

So, mixed feelings. I love feeling busy at work, and hey, getting recognized by the president of SLCC isn't too bad. I can't wait for my new guitar. I'm so proud of my dad, yet sad to lose him. I want SOO badly to debate, but I have no idea how I'm going to pay for it all.
It's late (well, sorta), I've got a ton of stuff left to do tonight, and a hell of a day tomorrow, so I'll sign off for a now. I'll be back on Wednesday, but I don't know when I'll have a chance to post more. If you need to get a hold of me while I'm gone, call me. My number's on my Facebook.

--Ruth

[Katze]

I is home.

More coming later.

[RK_lover]

Hi Katze....I look forward to the update, and congrats on the new guitar!

[Katze]

I know it's been a while, 2 months, but I just haven't been able to take time to update CGR.

Life has been tough, really tough. I don't know why, but God keeps shoving me in different directions. Right now, I'm okay. Yesterday, I wasn't, and tomorrow, who knows. It would take too long to write up everything that's happened, so I'll make it quick:

I dropped my dad off on the trail, he made it 150 miles before he had to give out due to injuries. I moved in to his apartment while he was gone, and lived with him after he got back. When I got back from CA, my apartment had been broken into.....('nother long story).

I taped StudentFest 2008, a weekend long rock concert, and was completely exhausted, but made a bunch of good contacts in the video and music world, and have since gotten more jobs from that.

The Manti Pageant Outreach this year was fantastic, simply amazing. There's pictures up on my FB, if any of you are interested.

When I was in Manti, I found out that one of my best friend's sisters had been hit by a car and was in a coma. The 2 weeks after I got back from Pageant were spent at the hospital with her and her family. Her funeral was yesterday, and I'm still trying to recover.

This just happens to be the busiest week at work in forever, which means I get paid more, but it's also not a good time for my car to break down. (grr.....)

I've got a 2nd part-time job, nannying for a friend of mine. I'm hoping that it will work out well, I start on Monday.

There's 2 other HUGE things in my life right now, but I can't exactly mention them here for fear that my mom or sisters might be reading this blog. If you want to know what they are, PM me.

And so, audios for a few days. Hopefully it won't be 2 months this time before I'm back. Sorry for being so techical in my writing, words just aren't coming easily today.