[dogfood]

Once upon a time, there was a king. His name was Gunther. Now, King Gunther ruled over a large city and the surrounding countryside, and he was a benevolent and sensible ruler. All the people loved him, except the criminals. He was a great diplomat, and the rulers of the neighboring kingdoms respected him as well.

King Gunther had a beautiful wife named Eioloaieu. (Queen Eioloaieu was foreign, and King Gunther had met her during the crusades when he was in the middle east. They never told anyone where she was originally from, so I don't know. Anyway, she was not European, so that explains the name.) King Gunther and Queen Eioloaieu had been married some years previous while Gunther was still only a Prince, and they were still madly in love. They had six sons (Gunther II, William, Henry, Robert, Gregory, and Frederich) and six daughters (Eioloaieu II, Mieaurreaiellieuabelle, Iienieuve, Euoneilida, Poeillienna, and Auienietea). (He named the sons, and she named the daughters, if that wasn't obvious.)

Now, each of their children had made a name for something in the kingdom.

The eldest, Eioloaieu II, was the greatest seamstress in all the land. She provided the dress uniforms for the king's court, among other things. She had a team of over fifty skilled seamstresses and tailors working under her supervision, but she always sewed the dress uniforms for the king's court herself. Her work was prized far abroad, and a simple scarf that she had made would sometimes sell for a year's wages in neighboring kingdoms.

The eldest son, Gunther II, was the Captain of the King's Guard. He commanded seven staunch guardsmen (besides himself, for a total of eight) who were famous throughout the land for their alertness, prowess, loyalty, and valor. Their job was to guard the King so that no assassin could harm him, and they were always careful not to neglect that duty. Of the eight, only two of them slept at any given time, and the other six were awake, so King Gunther was under constant guard.

The third-oldest child was William, and Prince William was a scholar of great fame. William had singlehandedly calculated the speed of light in a vacuum in furlongs per fortnight with eleven significant digits of accuracy before most scientists were even aware that light had a finite speed. (We would still be using his figure today except for the fact that it proved too difficult to convert velocity in furlongs/fortnight into modern units, and it was simpler to do the calculation over again in SI.) Prince William had also translated the entire works of Aristotle and Homer into Sanskrit, but this was lost due to an unfortunate library fire. In any event, William was the chief of King Gunther's advisors, and he headed a board of seven great wise men for this purpose (eight counting himself). Between the eight of them there was no problem so difficult that they could not devise a solution, and no piece of minutia so trivial and obscure that they were not aware of it.

Princess Mieaurreaiellieuabelle and Princess Iienieuve were twins. From birth they were both tomboys to some extent or another, and they had insisted on studying warfare with their brothers. As a result, Princess Mieaurreaiellieuabelle was the greatest archer in all the world, and Princess Iienieuve was the greatest weapons smith in all history. You have heard stories of Robin Hood, and how he was the greatest archer in London and perhaps England, but had he met Mieaurreaiellieuabelle he would have met his match, for she was the greatest archer in all the world. She always carried her unique compound bow. Prince William and his scholars had designed it so that it would propel an arrow further, faster, and straighter than any other bow even to this day, and Princess Iienieuve had built it for her, and had done such an excellent job that it exceeded even William's specifications. Princess Mieaurreaiellieuabelle had practiced so much with this bow that she could fire an arrow from her window in the castle with a cheesecloth bag attached containing a special powder (that Prince William's royal alchemist Trent prepared) into a cloud and cause it to begin to rain. She could also shoot a mosquito out of the air from five hundred yards distant. Princess Iienieuve built weapons the like of which had never been seen before in Europe nor have been since. Besides the bow she made for Princess Mieaurreaiellieuabelle, Iienieuve had made all the swords and daggers for Prince Gunther II's guardsmen as well as all the armor, swords, daggers, pikes, halberds, morningstars, bows, arrows, helmets, greaves, and other accoutrements of war used by prince Frederich's army (which we shall come to in a moment). Every weapon she made was of the finest materials and workmanship, and she was known far and abroad.

Prince Henry was the master of the king's stables. That may not sound like a high position, but Henry made it a high position by the extent to which he took his work. He bred horses for speed, strength, intelligence, and compliance to training. His breed of horses was the best in all the world. (The breed did not survive to this day because a later, less sensible king sold them all off to various horse breeders who bred them in with other stock, which improved the other breeds but did not preserve the original breed. Ah, well, the accidents of history.) He supplied all the war horses for Prince Frederich's army as well as all the riding horses for all the land. His horses were so intelligent and so well trained that they could actually understand words and sometimes sentences spoken to them. Henry's own horse, Ed, was so well trained that he could tell it something like "take this message to my father, then wait for his reply and take it to my brother Frederich, then come back to me" and it would do exactly that. His horses were so strong that any one of them could pull as much weight as a large bull elephant. And they were so fast that they could outrun flying birds. Henry was no amateur stable keeper.

Prince Robert was a Wizard of the Great Staff. The Wizards of the Great Staff were an exclusive club of the world's greatest wizards, seven in all, and Prince Robert was the only one from Europe. He spent most of his time away from the kingdom, roaming about the corners of the universe seeking strange learnings, but he kept in contact with the kingdom by exchanging regular messages with Prince William by telepathy. Prince Robert was responsible for the kingdom's wonderful weather. King Gunther's kingdom was the only land in all Europe where the rain fell only on the crops and the sun made every day bright but never shone in anyone's eyes. And it always snowed on Christmas day, every year.

Princess Euoneilida was a poetess, and she wrote the greatest poetry ever written, and there has never been any better poetry before or since. Her poetry inspired all the people of the land to excel at whatever they might do. Her poetry was so intricate and finely crafted that even Prince William could not translate it into another language than the original, because too much meaning would be lost in the translation. She wrote poetry that made grown men weep just to read it, and she wrote poetry that filled everyone with mirth even at funerals. It is one of the seven greatest shames in the history of the universe that her poetry was all lost in an unfortunate library fire seventy-two years after her death.

Princess Poeillienna was the Chancelloress of the Exchequer, and she kept the kingdom's finances in top shape. Poeillienna dutifully collected every dime that was ever owed in the kingdom, not just taxes and other public debts but private ones as well if they could be proven. She kept the finances so carefully that King Gunther's land had the lowest tax rate in all Europe but yet could still afford to supply the land with greater services and goods than any other king could do. Gunther's subjects lacked for nothing, and in large part he had his daughter Poeillienna to thank.

Prince Gregory was the Royal Chef, and cookery of all kinds was his specialty. Every time King Gunther held a great feast or a banquet or some other great affair of state, his son Gregory would produce a tremendous repast for all concerned, and none ever left the table unsatisfied. Naturally, Prince Gregory and his team of chefs also provided the day-to-day meals for the castle staff, and it was considered one of the greatest benefits of working in King Gunther's castle. The food there was known far abroad as the best in the world. In fact it was the second-best in all history, but only Prince William and his wise men knew of the unspeakable culinary feats of the Great Kitchen of the Post Modern Neorecabites, the only food ever to rival Prince Gregory's work. They never mentioned it, because they didn't want to belittle Prince Gregory's work, which really was altogether wonderful and amazing. Men were known to trade a month's wages for a sample of the leftovers, and they were not disappointed.

Prince Frederich, as I have mentioned, was the General of the Armed Forces. It was his job to keep and train all the armed forces of the land. Although King Gunther always managed to keep peace with the neighboring kingdoms, He wanted his army kept in top shape just in case he should ever need to use it -- and Prince Frederich certainly kept it that way for him. All the men looked up to Frederich with great respect. He knew everything there was to know about war, and a little bit more. He knew everything about keeping men motivated, and he was very good at it. His army was the most able force in all the region, and had King Gunther ever deemed it necessary to go to war he most certainly would have won. Every neighboring king knew it, so King Gunther never had to go to war, and everyone knew he had Prince Frederich to thank. Prince William liked to call him "Pax Frederich" in jest, but only he and the other wise men understood the joke.

Princess Auienietea was the youngest, but at sixteen years of age she was already more responsible than most of the adults in the kingdom. She was in charge of the maintenance of the castle, and it was the best kept castle in all Europe, and possibly in all the world. She had a team of the land's best building engineers working under her, and she was constantly ordering improvements to the castle structure, additional rooms to be built, higher watchtowers, and so forth. She regularly commissioned tapestries from Princess Eioloaieu II's team of seamstresses, and she decorated the castle with a panache unknown at the time. With advise from Prince William, she made use of light colors, mirrors, well-placed windows, and other effects to keep the castle rooms looking light, airy, well ventilated, and spacious, without compromising the castle's structure in the least.

Everything in King Gunther's castle (and in his whole kingdom, actually) ran like clockwork. Everything and everyone had a place and a purpose, and everyone and everything was well tended. Except, unfortunately, for one thing King Gunther overlooked. The moat, it seems, was not really in anyone's jurisdiction. Princess Auienietea kept the castle, but the moat was outside the castle and separate, and in any event the marine world was outside her area of expertise. The trouble is that it wasn't anyone else's area of expertise either. No doubt Prince William's team of scholars could have had many things to say about the proper upkeep of a moat, but they were never consulted about it, and it never occurred to them that the moat might be falling into disrepair. The moat was just one of those things people walked past (or, indeed, over) every day without paying any attention to it. Prince Robert certainly could have kept the moat clean by keeping it flushed with extra rain or by drying it with extra sunshine, but he didn't think of it. Princess Euoneilida's poetry certainly could have inspired the people to keep the moat clean, but she never wrote any poetry about the moat; it was mundane, and she never thought of it. Even Gregory's kitchen staff never fetched the water for the kitchens from the moat, because the cisterns were never empty. (Prince Robert saw to that.) Everyone had his own area of expertise, and no one seemed to notice that the moat wasn't being taken care of by anyone. King Gunther and Queen Eioloaieu theoretically were in charge of everything, but they were busy making treaties and trade agreements with other area rulers, entertaining important visitors, overseeing everyone else's work, and all the things kings and queens generally are busy doing. They never noticed the moat, either.

So while the moat looked like any other moat on the surface, deep underneath it was unkempt, and strange things began to grow down there, unbeknownst to the inhabitants of the castle. This came to everyone's attention very suddenly one day, when some farmers were crossing the drawbridge into the castle, bringing food for the castle's larders. Seven horrible yellow fingers rose from the moat, reached over the drawbridge, took hold of the farmers, dragged them down, drowned them in the moat, then disappeared into the murky depths from whence they came. News of this spread quickly, and suddenly everyone was afraid to cross the moat. King Gunther knew he couldn't let this go on for long, so he called over his son Gunther II and asked him to take the guardsmen and dispatch the horrible yellow fingers.

"No problem," Prince Gunther told his father, "my men will chop them off at the knuckles." So Gunther roused the two sleeping guardsmen, and the eight of them set out to the drawbridge. Standing in a careful formation so as to be able to protect one another, they inched carefully out onto the drawbridge. At first the yellow fingers did not appear, but when they reached the halfway point the horrible fingers rose up. Prince Gunther and his men made a valiant effort to destroy the fingers, but they seemed to be unharmed by their swords and daggers, and one by one they dragged the guardsmen into the moat and drowned them. When King Gunther heard this he was very distraught, not only at the loss of his son, which would have been bad enough itself, and his guard, who had been with him constantly for years, but also because the yellow fingers were still in the moat.

Then Princess Eioloaieu II approached her father. "The solution," she said, "is simple, but elegant. What we need is not to kill the fingers, but to capture them. Allow my team of sewers to make the strongest and finest net that has ever been made, and we will catch the fingers up in the net and drag them out of the moat." This seemed good to the king, and he ordered that it be done. Seven days were spent on the sewing of the net, and it was indeed the strongest and finest that had ever been made. As everyone in the castle gathered to watch, Princess Eioloaieu II and her party of sewers all took hold of the edge of the net and cast the net into the moat. What happened next happened so fast that many who blinked missed it. Something deep in the moat, on the other end of the net, apparently gave a sharp tug, and all who were holding onto the net, including the eldest princess, lost their balance and fell forward into the moat. As they struggled to get out, seven horrible yellow fingers arose from the moat and began to grab each one and drown them in the moat. Only seven escaped, and sadly the princess was not among them. The king and queen were greatly distressed at the loss of their eldest daughter, not to mention the continued threat in the moat. But it was too late, and there was nothing to be done.

Having learned from Prince William what was afoot (or, rather, ahand), Prince Robert returned to the kingdom and conferred with his father the king. "Have no fear", he said finally. "I'll take care of this." Robert knelt at one end of the drawbridge and, reaching into his cloak, pulled out a fine powder, which he sprinkled about. Then, kneeling at the other end of the bridge, Robert sprinkled the powder there also. Then the wizardly prince swung his great staff aloft, uttering an incantation in an unknown language, and lightning struck both ends of the bridge at once, setting fire to the powder. The moat boiled. The sky turned yellow. Prince Robert stepped out onto the bridge, still chanting. As he neared the center of the bridge, Robert's chant grew louder, and a sphere of blue power could be seen encircling Robert. When the fingers appeared, they wrestled with the sphere, and Robert continued walking. Unable to penetrate the sphere and seize Robert, the fingers satisfied themselves with seizing the bridge, tearing it from its mountings, and dropping it into the boiling moat, Robert and all. There was a stunned silence as Robert sunk into the boiling moat. After a few moments the boiling subsided, and while the fingers did not resurface, neither did Robert. The sky faded from yellow to black, and night fell early that day.

Princess Auienietea approached her father the next morning. "If I may say so," she said, "it may be partly my fault that the yellow fingers have come, since I did not hire anyone to keep the moat clean. But I may have a solution. Why not have my building engineers create a wider, stronger, safer drawbridge, with high rails on the sides and a safety roof over the top, and surely then the yellow fingers will be unable to harm us as we cross it." This seemed good to King Gunther, and he cheered up a little at the prospect. Work began immediately, and seven days later Princess Auienietea announced that her building engineers would install the new bridge that afternoon. It was constructed of solid marble and granite, and there were cast iron bars extending up from the sides of the bridge to the iron mesh safety top. It was seven times as wide as the previous bridge, so someone walking down the middle need not even be visible from the moat at all. The new bridge was installed. Everyone gathered to watch the ceremony of the first lowering of the new bridge that would solve forever the problem of the yellow fingers. Princess Auienietea stepped out to the center of the bridge with golden scissors to cut the red ribbon and open the bridge for use. As she reached the middle, seven horrible yellow fingers arose from the moat. Passing straight through the stone and iron of the bridge as if ghosts, they grabbed the princess. As onlookers watched, horrified, the fingers squeezed the screaming Princess Auienietea between the bars at the edge of the bridge, dragged her down into the moat, drowned her there, and disappeared again.

King Gunther and Queen Eioloaieu were very distraught, as were all the people. Princess Auienietea was so young to die such an untimely death! (Not to mention that the hopes of safely crossing with the new drawbridge had been dashed...) It was decided that the army must be called in to put the horrible yellow fingers to death for their misdeeds. Now, Prince Frederich and the army were not in the castle, but were encamped a few leagues away at their usual training grounds. So the king wrote a letter to Frederich explaining the situation and asking that he bring the army at once to deal with the awful fingers of death. Princess Mieaurreaiellieuabelle wrapped this note around a blunt arrow and, standing on the battlements and looking through one of William's telescopes, shot the arrow into Frederich's pocket.

Frederich was always quick on the uptake, and noticing something in his pocket he immediately withdrew the arrow, and recognizing it as one of his sister's he unwrapped the note and read it immediately. Signaling his lead trumpeter, he called the army to attention, canceled the day's exercises, and announced the new assignment. "The kingdom is counting on you", he concluded. The army arrived at the far end of the drawbridge seven hours later.

Try as they might, however, there was little they could do about the maniacal yellow fingers. Their weapons either whisked harmlessly through the ghastly ghostly fingers or bounced harmlessly off. One by one the fingers began to drown the warriors in the moat, and seeing that the attack was not succeeding Frederich ordered the army to stop and hold back at the moat's edge. "We'll have to do something more drastic", he thought. Yelling across the moat to the onlookers in the castle, he cried "Fetch my father!" A page boy immediately left, and seven minutes later returned with King Gunther. Frederich yelled across again: "Father, we may have to drain the moat".

Now, ordinarily draining the moat would be avoided, because it could pose a security risk. (It had also never been attempted and was suspected to be difficult.) But under the circumstances Gunther quickly realized that it wasn't half the security risk of the fingers, so he yelled back "Go ahead," confident that however difficult it might be his son could get it done. That was all Frederich needed. He dispatched messengers to the surrounding villages to bring all the shovels that could be found. Within seven hours every soldier was holding a shovel, and the digging had begun in earnest. The army dug straight through the night and into the next day, and finally they had finished a channel to a nearby gorge. All that was needed was to connect it to the moat. Several brave men stepped forward to finish the task. Before they could put a shovel into the soil at the edge of the moat, however, the yellow fingers reached up and grabbed them, drowning them in the moat.

Prince Frederich was not about to let this stop him. He called for his brother William to come to the other end of the bridge, and once again, each yelling across, he asked something from inside. This time, he wanted to know how to make powerful explosives. William, of course, summoned his alchemist, and the formula was relayed. Army messengers were again dispatched to nearby villages, this time coming back with the necessary ingredients. The explosives were set into a cart, which was set rolling down the newly dug channel toward the moat. When it had nearly reached the moat, an archer shot a flaming arrow into the cart and everyone ducked behind something. The blast was very impressive, and soon water was flowing down the channel toward the gorge and, more importantly, away from the moat.

The moat was very deep, and the channel had to be dug to deeper levels several more times before the moat was drained. A fair quantity of explosive had to be used, too, because much of the digging had to go through solid rock. Finally, after four days, the moat was dry. More importantly, there was no sign of any yellow fingers. Satisfied, Prince Frederich promptly marched across the drawbridge.

Well, halfway across. Out of nowhere, seven yellow fingers came up out of the very rock at the bottom of the moat, seized poor Frederich, and dragged him down into the moat. There was no water to drown him, but the fingers solved this quandary by banging him against the rocks instead, and he was soon quite dead. Then it disappeared into the rock from which it had come. Once again the hopes of the kingdom were broken, and King Gunther and Queen Eioloaieu were nearly inconsolable, as this was the fifth child they had lost to the wretched fingers. Surely this much grief had never come upon the kingdom before!

From amid the weeping crowd a figure stepped forward, and began to usher the crowd aside. "I need room," he said. It was Prince Henry. King Gunther immediately tried to stop him. "Don't you think we've had enough grief for one day?"

"Father," replied Henry, "with all due respect, everyone who has been seized by this yellow blight has lingered upon the bridge. All have either stood there or walked across slowly. If someone were to move across with sufficient speed, the fingers would be too slow to catch him.

His father thought about this for a moment. "Surely you wouldn't risk your life to the notion that you can outrun the fingers?"

"No, not I. But I know who can outrun them." Then his father realized that he was thinking of his horses. He elaborated: "I will be riding on Ed, and if he cannot outrun the wicked fingers then there is nothing left for the kingdom to do but to despair." King Gunther really couldn't argue with this, and, somewhat apprehensive, he allowed the prince to continue. Soon all the people had been cleared from the path, making room for Ed to get a long running start. Prince Henry began to talk to Ed, explaining that it was important to run very fast today. Then, after a few warm up laps around the castle interior, Henry nudged Ed to full speed and headed toward the drawbridge. For his part, Ed ran faster than he had ever run before, which was quite fast. According to today's measurements he was probably moving something like a hundred miles per hour by the time he reached the drawbridge. Surely the fingers could not catch him moving that fast.

But they did. It happened so fast no one ever saw it, but Ed and Henry never made it to the other side. King Gunther and Queen Eioloaieu were far beyond sorrow by this point, and they simply stood there looking stunned. Finally the king decided that he had had enough, and he decreed that no one should try to cross the bridge any more.

Later that week funeral services were held for all those who had perished at the hands (or fingers, actually) of the menace in the moat. They were all decreed tragic heroes, and medals of valor were awarded postmortem. This did little to cheer anyone up, but it seemed appropriate. Then the king and queen went into mourning and asked not to be disturbed.

For several weeks no one bothered them, and no one had the audacity to attempt crossing the moat by any means. Finally, however, food supplies began to run low in the castle, and the people began to go hungry. Even Prince Gregory's skills were unable to stretch and multiply the food into great meals, and the rations became monotonous and feeble. Then the food supplies ran out entirely, since no food could be brought in over the moat, and everyone went hungry, even the king. Eventually he decided that something would need to be done about this, but he had no idea what. So he called in his council of advisors, headed by his oldest remaining son William.

"How can we get food?" he asked his wise son.

His son thought for a moment and said, "Someone will have to bring it from the farms -- across the moat." This seemed impeccably logical, but the king began to despair.

"But it cannot be done! I have no one left to send!"

"Have you no one left at all?" William prompted.

"None but my page boy", the king sarcastically replied.

William was silent for a moment, then looked straight into his father's eyes and spoke softly: "Send him."

Well, naturally King Gunther knew that he would only be sending his page boy to his death, but he reasoned that the boy could just as well die here in the castle of starvation if nothing were tried, so against his own judgment he decided to follow the odd advise of his son, and he asked his page boy to please cross the drawbridge and bring food back from one of the nearby farms or villages. For no particular reason he gave him a fair sum of money in case he should get there, figuring that he had nothing better to do with the money, since it was impossible to cross the bridge and spend it.

The boy left the king and, taking the money, headed for the bridge. King Gunther did not even watch the boy go, not wanting to see him die. Thus, he was surprised several hours later when the boy returned, pulling a large cart loaded with food. "How did you make it across?" he asked incredulously.

"I just went," said the boy, "and the yellow fingers stayed in the moat and didn't bother me!"

Pleased beyond all hope, King Gunther promptly handed the boy a much larger sum of money and instructed him by all means to have another go at that technique. And soon the boy returned, with an even larger cart of food, but he complained that he had a hard time pulling it all, and asked if perhaps another page could be hired to assist him if he were to repeat this on a regular basis. Naturally the king was more than happy to grant this request.

But King Gunther was mystified as to exactly why it was that the boy had succeeded where all others had failed, and he called back in his son William who had first advised him to send the boy, and asked him to explain. But William would not answer his questions and would only say, "Let your Pages do the Walking through the Yellow Fingers."

[MrCrabby]

I can't believe I actually read all of that.

I didn't even get the punchline, I had to look it up!

[+SEAL+]

Haha, not bad.

[Katze]

A little long. Just a little.

Loved it.

[guitarguy90]

I once calculated the speed of light in furlongs per fortnight. But not to 11 sig figs.

[Mathijs]

The speed of light is exactly 2.99792458*10^8 m/s. So that would be 1.802617758*10^12 furlongs per fortnight, exactly. (If, Wikipedia is right about the conversion between m/s and frulongs per fortnight.) No 11 significant figures there.

(and: yes, I didn't have to look up the lightspeed, I'm just an applied physics student/nerd)

[+SEAL+]

Wait...I would think that we can't know the speed of light exactly, since any measurement of it would have to be based on flawed material measurements.

[Rock 'n Christ]

Originally Posted by +SEAL+

Wait...I would think that we can't know the speed of light exactly, since any measurement of it would have to be based on flawed material measurements.

You've got a point there.

[Mathijs]

Originally Posted by +SEAL+

Wait...I would think that we can't know the speed of light exactly, since any measurement of it would have to be based on flawed material measurements.

Actually, we do. That's because we defined the speed of light. We base a lot of constants on that.

[+SEAL+]

Ah, that's how it works. (So technically, it's not really the speed of light, just really close?)

[Mathijs]

Originally Posted by +SEAL+

Ah, that's how it works. (So technically, it's not really the speed of light, just really close?)

No, it's exactly the speed of light. We defined that the speed of light is 2.99792458x10^8 m/s.
Based on that we can measure the length of a meter. So if we would get a better way to measure the speed of light the length of a meter is adjusted, the lightspeed remains constant.

[Fandrew]

Originally Posted by guitarguy90

I once calculated the speed of light in furlongs per fortnight. But not to 11 sig figs.

Originally Posted by Mathijs

The speed of light is exactly 2.99792458*10^8 m/s. So that would be 1.802617758*10^12 furlongs per fortnight, exactly. (If, Wikipedia is right about the conversion between m/s and frulongs per fortnight.) No 11 significant figures there.

(and: yes, I didn't have to look up the lightspeed, I'm just an applied physics student/nerd)

Originally Posted by +SEAL+

Wait...I would think that we can't know the speed of light exactly, since any measurement of it would have to be based on flawed material measurements.

Originally Posted by Rock 'n Christ

You've got a point there.

Originally Posted by Mathijs

Actually, we do. That's because we defined the speed of light. We base a lot of constants on that.

Originally Posted by +SEAL+

Ah, that's how it works. (So technically, it's not really the speed of light, just really close?)

Originally Posted by Mathijs

No, it's exactly the speed of light. We defined that the speed of light is 2.99792458x10^8 m/s.
Based on that we can measure the length of a meter. So if we would get a better way to measure the speed of light the length of a meter is adjusted, the lightspeed remains constant.

Not only this conversation completely irrelevant, it takes away from the humor of the original post. I ask that you please refrain.

[dogfood]

Originally Posted by JayCarrfan

Not only this conversation completely irrelevant, it takes away from the humor of the original post. I ask that you please refrain.

seeing as not many people found the original post funny, its probably quite a welcome edition to this thread

i cant beleive people still use furlongs

[~pyr3-p3rp13~]

scuz my ignorance but can somebody explain?

[+SEAL+]

Originally Posted by ~pyr3-p3rp13~

scuz my ignorance but can somebody explain?

It's a play off of the slogan "Let your fingers do the walking through the Yellow Pages."