[conceived in fire]

In the beginning, there were only woodwinds in the band.

But it was soon discovered that some people were too slow to move the fingers of both hands at the same time, so these people were given instruments that only required movement of one hand. These people sat in the back and were called "brass."

But some people were too clumsy to do even that, so they were given instruments that required no finger movement at all. These people sat way in the back, cracked disgusting jokes all day, and were called "trombonists" (Italian for "clumsy fools").

But some people were too stupid to blow into something while moving their arms. These people were each given two sticks and told to bang them on whatever they felt like, hence creating percussionists.

But one guy was too stupid for that! So in the end, they just took away one of his sticks and told him to stand in the front, wave the one stick around, and yell at anyone with any talent.

And that was the origin of the first conductor.

[normajean777]

Haha thats actually pretty funny.