[Nate]

I am ashamed that I did not mention board / card games. If you saw my closet, you'd know why.

[adamkaboom]

Originally Posted by Emo_Rachael

Board and/or card games are excellent group activities as well. If you want to spend less time making out, then you'll want to spend less time alone. Or at least less time alone in private places. Also, about the whole growing closer to God thing. You are correct that if you both seek God and pray together that you will grow closer together. Just be careful you don't grow too close. The spiritual and emotional parts of us are connected, so when you grow in one area, the other will want to follow. The thing is, that could lead to a stronger desire for physical intimacy as well. The closer you two get, the more you're going to want to make out. I know you already know that, but I just want to say "be careful." Be careful.

Right-o you are! The time that we do spend alone, really won't be, "alone" you know? That's what we're shooting for anyway. And as far as a devotional or something like that goes... if we do one together... I'm going to try to find something that doesn't appeal much to the emotions, as it does our thinkers lol. If anything, maybe just pray together? I don't honestly know...

[Ordinary Sarah]

I agree with what Nate had to say. I don't think you should use making out as a way to get closer to each other, but I also don't think you should use God as a means of getting closer, either. If that make sense. I think you both should be, individually, growing closer to God, and then allowing that desire to grow closer to him be a common element in your relationship.


But I do think it is good that you want to spend more time doing other, more meaningful things together.


I like the idea of board and card games as well. Also... this is kinda weird, but something I've always thought would be neat to do with a significant other (though I have yet to find a guy who's really up for it...): reading together. Maybe taking turns reading aloud. Then chatting about it. I think that would be so much fun, imo. I guess you could even read your bible together. =)


Oh, and have you thought about going on double dates with your parents? Or is that weird....



Not so they can check up on you or anything. Certainly not. But just a way to connect with them. =)

[adamkaboom]

Yea, those are some good points... some stuff for us to think about. I guess I want to add that I didn't mean for the "love triangle" to sound like a forced relationship with God just so that her and I can grow closer. Our individual time with God is still extremely important... and is absolutely necessary to our walk with Him. I'm sorry for the misunderstanding there

[SwitchfootRulz!]

Originally Posted by adamkaboom

You know... the love triangle?

God
|
/-\
/----\
/------\
/---------\
Her----------Me

As we both grow closer to God.....

God
|
/ \
Her---Me
/-------\
/---------\
/------------\

We grow closer to each other at the same time... see?

So mainly... what fun things we can do with friends (group stuff) so that we can be active together. And, what are some things that we can do to grow closer spiritually and focus on God in our relationship? Help me be creative... cause remember... small town... not much in the way of places to go. Thanks everyone!

Adam

I'm in the same boat as you are man. Small town, keeping God first, having fun...

Originally Posted by H.M. Murdock

On the spiritual end: I find that establishing Christ-centered relationships of any kind is made much easier if Christ is actually a pretty common topic of meditation with the other person.

Most definitely.

Originally Posted by steggz

I found it really worthwhile to actually include a time of prayer and sharing with my girlfriend of things that we'd learnt through our personal devotionals, Bible studies or in sermons. Just a little time (20 mins or so) and it was a good time to not only focus on our most common link, but also to understand a little better how we tick spiritually.

This is really good.

Originally Posted by adamkaboom

I'm going to try to find something that doesn't appeal much to the emotions, as it does our thinkers lol. If anything, maybe just pray together? I don't honestly know...

Praying together is quite possibly the most overlooked aspect in a Christian relationship, I believe.

Originally Posted by SarahTheGuitarist

I guess you could even read your bible together. =)


Oh, and have you thought about going on double dates with your parents? Or is that weird....



Not so they can check up on you or anything. Certainly not. But just a way to connect with them. =)

I've taken my girlfriend on dates where we just sit in a coffeehouse for hours with smoothies and a Bible, talking for hours about what God is doing in us individually and just reading the Bible together.

And the parents thing is not a bad idea, I've done that a few times actually. It may sound weird to most people, but having a good relationship with each of your parents is great.

Originally Posted by adamkaboom

I guess I want to add that I didn't mean for the "love triangle" to sound like a forced relationship with God just so that her and I can grow closer. Our individual time with God is still extremely important... and is absolutely necessary to our walk with Him. I'm sorry for the misunderstanding there

I was surprised to see the "love triangle" in your post; I'd only heard of it once and I didn't know it was widespread. But either way, I totally understand what you meant.

But the best date so far, which may sound weird, was yesterday. We just danced outside for hours with my car playing worship music...and let me tell you that was such an amazing feeling. Worshipping and praying together is incredible.

[adamkaboom]

Originally Posted by SwitchfootRulz!

But the best date so far, which may sound weird, was yesterday. We just danced outside for hours with my car playing worship music...and let me tell you that was such an amazing feeling. Worshipping and praying together is incredible.

YES! We did that a couple weeks ago... starlit night with some chris rice going... we didn't pray at that time...but we had a good spiritual talk

[Kati]

There are so many things you can have fun doing besides making out.

Cribbage is awesome, as is gin rummy. We used to play poker all the time using pennies for chips, and you can get your whole family in on that--it's a LOT of fun. Neither my husband nor my father can bluff with me to save their lives. Play Scrabble and make up your own silly rules (10 extra points for Bible names, or something). We have a set of games that we picked up for $10 that has chess, checkers, Chinese checkers, backgammon, cribbage, mancala, and a few others, and we still play with it all the time (lots of ways to play with just two people, or a whole group), and there are tons of board games you can pick up that you could play in a group as well.

Double dating with parents is not weird, either; we've done essentially that with both his parents and mine, and it can be great. (So long as nobody gets too mushy. I imagine that's...sorta weird.) But it can be a good time to talk with the parents and keep them involved in your lives and what's going on in your relationship. After all, if you end up married, her parents will be your in-laws, and vice versa.

I love the sound of sitting outside and sipping cappuccino, too. My husband and I have some of our best talks just sitting out on the porch drinking cider or coffee. If you want to keep God at the center of your relationship...talk about God. You don't have to do a study together to accomplish that, necessarily. If God is a big part of your life, it will follow that he's a big part of your relationship, too. If you're striving to be closer to God in your personal life, it's certain to spill over into everything else.

But really I just came here to say cribbage is awesome.

[adamkaboom]

We got to hang out last weekend, and we are going to get to see eachother again this weekend. We're figuring things out to keep us busy and have a good time. Last weekend we went for a walk, went and saw my grandparents, played some one-on-one b-ball, "watched" (we talked most of the time) a movie, played speed... we had a great time together!...not that we didn't before... but you know. It was nice to not be sitting there twiddling our thumbs. Thanks for all the help everyone!