What now?

OnMyFace · 04-24-2007, 05:44 AM

Hey guys, first trhead started by me...
umm... Yesterday morning I got a call that said that two of my good friends died in a plane crash. So yesterday was pretty much of nothing. Well I wake up today, wondering what I am supposed to do, am I supposed to get over it now? Or am I supposed to mourn for a while?? I am just confused about my perspective on life, this is a wake-up call for me. These guys were so happy all the time and never did anything to hurt anyone, why them!?

Josh

:RIP: Chris and Mike McCarthy- 4/22/07

bobthecockroach · 04-24-2007, 07:17 AM

Don't let anyone make you think you're "supposed" to do anything. This is a tragic event. Respond to it in whatever way feels natural to you.

**MtlMom** · 04-24-2007, 08:10 AM

I think one of the hardest things to deal with when tragedy strikes is the fact that life goes on, when it seems like the world should just stop for a bit. Some people feel the need to push through their day and stay busy right after a tragedy, others need to stay home and collect their thoughts and feelings. It's hard to feel "right" when everything feels so wrong. I'll pray for you and their family

**Chrysostom** · 04-24-2007, 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OnMyFace

Hey guys, first trhead started by me...
umm... Yesterday morning I got a call that said that two of my good friends died in a plane crash. So yesterday was pretty much of nothing. Well I wake up today, wondering what I am supposed to do, am I supposed to get over it now? Or am I supposed to mourn for a while?? I am just confused about my perspective on life, this is a wake-up call for me. These guys were so happy all the time and never did anything to hurt anyone, why them!?

Josh

:RIP: Chris and Mike McCarthy- 4/22/07

Don't let anyone tell you that you have to "move on." This is a tragedy, and if it hurts then there's nothing wrong with that at all. I'm so sorry.

OnMyFace · 04-24-2007, 03:12 PM

I know that this is going to sound like "typical teen angst" but I am not sure what is right anymore. I am feeling empty. I think I should feel more sadness than this ( I am telling myself this). But I am thinking that any minute they will pop in the door and yell april fools... I am not sure what I am feeling anymore.

I think I will feel it more after the viewing and funeral... I feel terrible that I am not sobbing every free minute.

bobthecockroach · 04-24-2007, 03:48 PM

Everyone grieves differently. Don't try to make yourself believe there's a right and wrong way to do it.

***BillSPrestonEsq*** · 04-24-2007, 04:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OnMyFace

I feel terrible that I am not sobbing every free minute.

Just to focus on this... A lot of times when tragedy strikes you feel numb. It takes time to sink in, and sometimes it can take quite some time.

**Rainer.** · 04-24-2007, 07:08 PM

Yes to all of the above. There is no set way to deal with a loss of a loved one, and you should feel only what you are feeling, and not how you think that things should feel, because things are difficult now.

Don't think you're not doing the right thing, because in fact, I've had many friends who have felt that they should be more affected by the death of a friend or relative right after the fact, but it's not true, because people are so individual in their relationships and their personalities that everyone will feel things a bit differently.

OnMyFace · 04-26-2007, 07:48 PM

Hye guys, went to the viewing today... It was hard...
Seeing 3 caskets... (the dad died too, along with the two 15 yr olds). Their pictures were above all 3 caskets. I cried as I signed all 3 caskets with a note. I sat there for about 30 minutes realizing that they wont ever come back. It has really hit me now. I am in a very touchy state right now. I was reading their "in memory" pamphlet, cried a while.

Anyways... pray for the mother and the son ( a senior now). With the dad gone, their in trouble finding the son's way to college. And the mom is refusing to eat most of the time, the son is taking it better, people constantly in and out of the house bringing comfort and gifts.

Thought I would update u. I am going to the funeral tommorow, I will find out if I am pallbearer also...