[tigerfan88]

The netbook arrived today. Some early thoughts:

* Windows 7 Starter edition sucks. It is so limited that you cannot change your desktop background. Seriously. You also miss out on a lot of the cool, typically standard 7 features (Windows XP compatibility mode, for instance). Still, it's better than running XP or Vista.

* The netbook is even smaller and more portable than I imagined. But in a good way. It easily fits in my arms and I can see myself just carrying the thing around much like a purse.

* The keyboard is a lot smaller. For someone with small hands and fingers, such as myself, this is actually good. In fact, after giving myself a few minutes of adjusting to the smallness, I was able to type a little faster than normal. For someone with big hands, the adjustment may take a little longer. But I like it.

* The computer runs pretty smoothly for having such a puny processor and only 1GB RAM. Despite this, I have plans to upgrade the RAM to the max of 2GB.

* Having a built-in web cam is nice. It's actually a pretty decent quality. However, I have my doubts as to how much I'll actually use it.

* The computer seems to be built pretty strongly and is definitely appealing to look at. My main concern with this netbook is that of how long it will hold up. If I get 2-3 years of mileage out of this thing, I'll be ecstatic. Anything less than 2, even with the cheap price, is disappointing. However, if this thing holds up for at least a couple years, I feel confident in saying the Aspire One is a good purchase.

[bravesfan007]

It's nice to know that I need to avoid Windows 7 Starter now. I couldn't imagine at least being able to change the desktop. That would suck majorly.

[tigerfan88]

It definitely does. I did find a way, using tweaks.com, to at least change the logon screen, so at least that's something you can customize. Other than the other limitations of 7, it's not a horrible choice for someone who just wants to browse the internet, email and take notes. In my case, I get a lot of use out of those features that are kept out of Starter edition, so an upgrade is definitely in my future, especially since my school sells 32-bit Windows 7 Ultimate for only $20.

Well, I'm currently sitting bored in Statistics class. It's kinda surprising to me how much I'm liking this class so far this semester (even though it's not always easy). The Prof is really good with the material and very fair with homework and exams. Definitely one of my favorite college classes so far.

[tigerfan88]

Another week has gone by. Time has passed even quicker this semester than in past years, and I'm finding it hard to believe that it's already November 7th and there's only six weeks left of classes. I'm really happy to almost have this semester finished and it's looking like I may have even better grades than I expected.

Life otherwise has been busy this week. I worked 23 hours this week (due to training today), I've been working on getting things organized around here and settling into a more productive schedule, and I've spent time thinking about things that are keeping me from getting stuff done, and attempting to solve those issues. I've come to some conclusions that may potentially alter my life quite a bit, but I've decided to wait a little and pray some more before following through with those.

[tigerfan88]

Today has been a day of changes. Upon looking at my upcoming class schedules through graduation, I noticed that things were a bit off. I had planned on taking a class this coming semester that I do not have the prereqs for (yet) and neglected the fact that I need 4 more credits beyond what I had planned on. I then looked at my planned senior year schedule and realized just how daunting it looked. 15 and 16 credit hours when you're doing a capstone project both semesters is a bit much.

At that point, I freaked out. I started second guessing everything, started wondering if I had what it took to even graduate. This despite the fact that I have good grades and despite the fact that I am a hard worker.

So some might say, well, why not delay graduation? It was a thought I could not bear. Even the thought being 6 months late (going from May 2011 to November/December) was really annoying to me. I had always planned on getting out in roughly 3.7 years. I did not want to delay my graduation.

Then I started thinking and praying about it. It calmed me down considerably. I discovered that my college actually offers an August graduation (I'd still be walking in May) and that this would give me the Spring/Summer semesters to knock out 6-12 credit hours. It'd also allow me to free up my final Winter semester to the point where I could intern for a few months at a place where my brother works (they're an Accounting company but take on lots of interns in technology, too) because he'd be able to probably get me in there, or at least put in a good word. Hopefully that would lead to a full time job which I could even start during the summer before I "technically" officially graduate.

Needless to say, it didn't take me long to accept this new plan. I can live with graduating a few months later if it helps me to manage my stress level better. I'll be seeing my advisor soon to make sure I've covered everything in my planned schedule, but at the moment, it looks good.

It never ceases to amaze me how God provides for me. I know I haven't been spending nearly enough time with Him lately, but He's always there for me when I really need it. I can count at least ten occasions in the past few years where I've gone through something tough and He's provided for me in ways I could never possibly have imagined. When non-Christians ask me how I can believe in Him, I could give Biblical reasons, but I almost always point to what He's done for me and the fact that I constantly feel His presence in my life. It's just undeniable in my mind.

[bravesfan007]

There is nothing wrong with pushing yourself to succeed and do great things, but sometimes the stress overcomes it. I found out that if I am stressed beyond words then I end up doing worse at things than if I would have taken a little bit of time longer.

It's also better on your health if you don't have to worry about particulars.

[tigerfan88]

Originally Posted by bravesfan007

There is nothing wrong with pushing yourself to succeed and do great things, but sometimes the stress overcomes it. I found out that if I am stressed beyond words then I end up doing worse at things than if I would have taken a little bit of time longer.

It's also better on your health if you don't have to worry about particulars.

Yep, I completely agree with this. I've been known to push myself hard, and while most of the time I can keep up with it, sometimes it's just too much. Ultimately, I have to do what's best for my health and in this case, it's lightening the load a bit.

Well, it's been an interesting weekend. I've gotten a good bit of stuff done and I'm feeling like this should be a productive week. I do, however, have to stop staying up so late at night, and I think my plan of giving up some distractions for the next week will help me in doing that.

And some lyrics that seem to apply to my life right now:

"It's funny how times can change, rearrange and distance makes
The pain fade away
So important then, doesn't matter now
Both feet on the ground
Come full circle, full circle, come full circle
We have come full circle"

[tigerfan88]

Things are starting to get better and better, and I'm FINALLY making the changes I've been wanting to make. I decided on Sunday to back away from a few things that were holding me back, at least for the next week, anyway. So I've been using the time I spent on those things (yes, this includes Facebook and MySpace, amongst other internet activities) to do things like catch up on sleep, plot out things financially (so that I can get ahead and stay ahead) and just plain get organized. Today has been exceptionally productive in this regard, and the coming weeks look even better despite the fact that I will be spending more and more time on homework and exams as the semester comes to a close.

Some good things that are happening right now (or will be soon):

* Securing floor tickets to see U2 next summer. Should be an amazing time, especially since I plan on being front row center.
* Getting a $1,000 paycheck from my work at Demand Studios (this will all but cover my tuition for next semester, which is a complete blessing) next week.
* Heading to the west side of the state to spend Thanksgiving with family.
* Having a bit of a break from school next week (and a day off from work).

Not to mention the whole Holiday season and all the fun stuff that brings. I'm pretty happy and content with life right now.

[tigerfan88]

Last week was overall pretty good (got my GA tickets for the U2 concert), though there was some stress over the weekend. For the past 5 months, my brother, his fiancee and his two kids have been staying at our house ever weekend. Which wouldn't be a problem, except the house is not that big, and they do not clean up after themselves, control our TV and computer, eat all our food (including my snacks that I buy to take to school/work with me) are extremely loud and noisy (no sleeping in) and monopolize the washer.....and weekends are my time to get laundry done, work on my room, catch up on homework etc..

I've patiently put up with this for months, but in the past month, I've reached my breaking point. I've tried to set in place some rules, which have infuriated my brother. That's led to arguments between us, and even though it's my house (my parents have said this, and I do a lot of the housework and have definitely earned my place there, not to mention I've bought some of the stuff) my brother still thinks that it's his house.....even though he's been out of it for a decade now and has worn out his welcome staying here every single weekend for the past 5 months. Before he stayed here, he stayed with his fiancee's mother and he wore out his welcome there. Before that, it was my brother's house, and yet again, he wore out his welcome. See a pattern here?

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't the most intolerant person I know. He acts high and mighty and judgmental, yet he continues to do things that aren't moral at all. It's hypocrisy at it's worse. He tries to control what's on the TV, even if it's not even offensive at all (and even though it's our TV and not his). He's very controlling toward his fiancee and won't "let" her listen to certain things or watch certain things. It's beyond ridiculous, and sad to say, I actually find myself siding with my brother's fiancee because I feel sympathetic about the situation.

Anyway, they've been arguing a lot in our house, and I used to ignore it, but the past couple weeks, I've been calling him out on his crap. He hasn't liked that at all, and I hate conflict, but no one else is growing a spine and letting him know that his behavior is unacceptable, especially in someone else's house.

This is the same brother who was suicidal almost two years ago after his ex left him. He was committed to a hospital at that time and got out a few days later. My brother took him in to help him get back on track, but my brother did not make much progress. He didn't stick with therapy or take his antidepressants. Finally my other brother got fed up and asked him to move out. Sometime around this time he started dating his current fiancee, and soon proposed. They made the mistake of purchasing a house when he did not have nearly enough money to realistically handle things. Not to mention, the house needed to be gutted and still is not finished. He's been staying with us/his fiancee's mother for the past year and a half (5 of those months with us) because the house is still not finished....and not anywhere near it. He's always had dependency issues (he's never been alone, having lived with my parents til he was 18, then he lived with one girl and then another for 7 years) and maybe that's why he won't finish the house and stop depending on my mom to make meals on the weekend and babysit his kids.

At this point, I have doubts whether he'll even finish the house. I have doubts he'll even get help for his depression. And I'm beginning to think he's never going to grow up and move forward, and stop relying on his parents and family to pull him through everything. He's 30 years old now; my parents are in their 60's and I feel they deserve to retire and live in peace. They shouldn't have to put up with his crap and stress out about whether or not he'll kill himself. They've raised 5 kids and my mom has babysat my two nieces and nephew for the past 9 years. She deserves to have her weekends free to herself, and she tells me this all the time. But she is so afraid of what might happen to my brother that she won't stick up for herself. She'd rather lose sleep and be exhausted all the time than tell him no.

It kills me. I'm so conflicted about this. I know, as a Christian, that I'm supposed to love and be there for him. And I do and I have been. But in two years, no progress has been made and he's continued to make the dumbest mistakes ever. Is it wrong of me to be blunt and put my foot down? Or should I just let him walk all over us?

There is, of course, a temporary solution: he's going to be staying with my sister and her husband/three kids for the next few weeks. But this, too, bothers me. They enjoy their family weekends and don't need my brother's stress seeping into their lives. My brother-in-law is already not happy about things, and I can't blame him. It just bothers me that my family continues to let my brother manipulate them rather than telling him to get some help for himself. Ugh.

[bravesfan007]

I think that sometimes people never grow up despite their age. I know people well into their forties that still relied on their parents to do everything. This includes not only living with them, but to cooking and doing their laundry. It's rough to see it happen, but until someone getting taken advantage of steps up and says something, nothing will change. I believe it's human nature to push someone and take advantage of them as much as possible. We're lazy people by nature and would rather have everything provided for us.