Diary of a Sanctoid

tigerfan88 · 09-09-2007, 10:30 PM

I now realize how blessed I am. It's funny how the rough spots in our lives can make us realize how much God has blessed us. Yes, I've had some things happen that were definitely depressing, but it's OK and I'm going to get through it with God's help. And I think these happenings may have been a blessing in disguise as it forced me to get more in touch with my spiritual side. I've been praying and reflecting on the Bible more this week than in quite some time. As a result, I'm so much happier and more focused on God. It's great!

My ex-friend/boyfriend/whatever you want to call him and I did not end the relationship on good terms. He has rejected the idea of even being friends, so it's a bit of a blow to lose not just a significant other, but also a good friend. In retrospect, I shouldn't have even let it get to the point which it did. I should have seen the signs that it was doomed to fail. The fact that he asked me to be his GF when we hadn't even met yet, all his messages on my MySpace etc. should have shown me that he was moving toward something way faster than I was. True, we had a lot in common, but just because you're so alike someone else does not mean it will work out. Or that you should rush into something you're not ready for. So I've learned my lesson in this regard. For me, it's better to take something slower and then build up to it than it is to jump in head first.

With that said, I'm actually kinda happy to be single again. It takes a lot of pressure off of my life and allows me to focus on my studies and on my relationship with God. I've learned that I need to let God work His magic in my life. He'll bring me the person He wants me to be with when He's ready to.

Remember my last posting stating I didn't get a work study job? Well, Thursday morning, ITS called my house and I talked with the secretary. She wanted to interview me for an office position there. Sure, it's not troubleshooting PCs or monitoring the lab, but it's still something that allows me to help other people. It would pay decently and should fit into my schedule. So I've got an interview for that tomorrow afternoon. Hopefully it goes good.

In other news, I freakin' love college! I'm enjoying my classes (except for Calculus, grr!) and starting to make some friends. I'm looking at joining a few different groups and getting involved on campus. It's going great so far and, like I said, I love going to school. I mean, I loved Homeschooling, but I love college just as much.

Alright, now I'm all hyper and I don't want to get to bed. However, I must go to sleep because I have Calc early tomorrow. If I don't sleep, it's CGR's fault. So thanks in advance for a sleepless night, CGR!

tigerfan88 · 09-10-2007, 11:43 AM

I slept good last night, so I won't be suing Bill. (you lucked out!) Now I'm just waiting in a lobby for my interview with ITS. I'm praying it goes well.

tigerfan88 · 09-12-2007, 06:51 PM

Still no word on the job. So I'm not sure if I got it. If I didn't, it's really no big deal as I have plenty of freelance work lined up.

I have a Calc test on Monday. I'm a bit nervous about that and will be spending a lot of time this weekend reviewing the material.

I had Music class today. It was slightly more interesting as we worked with keyboards, but still pretty bland. I have a test for that a week from Monday.

Then there's Logic. It's all very confusing, but I'm enjoying it. The prof is very funny.

I'm still adjusting to being a college student and not a homeschooler anymore, but I really enjoy it right now and look forward to getting involved on campus. I really want to join two Christian groups on campus, but at the moment, things are too busy. I'll probably join in a month or so.

tigerfan88 · 09-13-2007, 12:30 PM

I had a panic attack of sorts this morning. I realized that I have $895 due in tuition next week and not nearly enough money saved to pay for it. I haven't been contacted by ITS, so I doubt I got the job. I also haven't received the scholarship that I was counting on.

So I told my mom all about my financial situation and, as usual, she told me it would be alright. She ended up calling about the scholarship and not only am I getting it, but I'm getting more than I expected. Praise God! I still don't have a job, but I think I should be able to get enough freelance work to cover the rest of my expenses. That's how it usually is. I get worried about something and God provides. It's pretty amazing.

tigerfan88 · 09-13-2007, 09:50 PM

Tomorrow I have one class at college, then I'm going to go to Financial Aid, figure out what I owe and hopefully apply for a few jobs. Hopefully I can find some work down there, but even if I don't, God always provides, so I'll be fine.

tigerfan88 · 09-15-2007, 05:49 PM

Man, Monday is going to be busy. I have a Calc test at 9:30 (which did worry me, but now that I've spent time prepping, I think I'll do fine), then Logic, then I'll be going to apply for different jobs, then Music at 4PM. Then I come home, do some freelance work and probably my Logic HW. I'm trying to free up Tuesday night so that I can go to an IVCF game night at my college. I don't know if I'll be able to do it for sure, but it would be fun.

Tomorrow I have a birthday party to attend. It's for my brother and sister. Before that, I have Church. Then after all of that, hopefully some last minute prep for the Calc test. That's pretty much it, I guess.

tigerfan88 · 09-18-2007, 11:00 PM

It's funny how quickly life can change. I had my Calc test yesterday and probably did horribly on it. That made me think about my intended career which ultimately led me to decide that Software Engineering probably isn't what I want to do with my life. This then led me to flirt with the idea of switching my major from Computer Science to Computer Information Systems. I'm still not sure what I'm going to do. My #1 priority, school-wise, is to pass the Calc class and do good in my other classes (which I am). Then, hopefully by the Winter semester, I'll have my decision made. Right now, I am leaning toward CIS. But before I make a concrete decision, I'm going to talk with CS faculty at my college and get their opinion.

So tomorrow, I have Calc, Logic and Music. My second Logic homework is due tomorrow and, as of right now, I have it all finished aside from a couple of questions. It's very tough work, but I should make at least a B, if not an A. I'll be satisfied with either.

I just turned in my English essay today. Here's hoping it gets an A.

I got my first Unix assignment back and ended up making a 17.5 out of 20. Which, at first, disappointed me. But then I found out that two other very smart computer people in my class got less than that. Apparently, our Prof is really, really strict when it comes to the grading.

I have another couple of Computer assignments due within the next week or two. Those are easy for me.

Adjusting to college has been a lot easier than I expected. Yes, the Academics are harder, but for the most part, I'm able to handle it easily. I'm also starting to talk to people in my classes and starting to make friends, which is awesome.

Now I'm exhausted and in need of a good night's sleep before I get up and do it all again.

tigerfan88 · 09-22-2007, 12:51 PM

It's been a crazy week, to say the least. I met with my adviser a couple of days ago and he advised me to do 6 hours of homework a night and keep plugging away at CS--for now at least. The 6 hours is ridiculous considering my most taxing classes are Music, Math and Logic, and I can't see myself spending 2 hours a night on those. I think 3 hours a day of HW is plenty. But, for now, I'm sticking with CS and seeing how the rest of this semester goes.

Wednesday, I was contacted via email by an assistant provost for the Assessment and Accreditation department at my college. She said that the department was looking for a web designer for their part of the University web site and she wanted to know if I was interested. I said yes and we set up a meeting time for 11AM yesterday. So I left my Math lecture early and headed over to their small-ish office. I was then promptly hired for the job. What I'll be doing is updating the overall look of their site, plus updating the content management system for it. It's something that is relevant to my major and will look good on my resume, so I'm very happy about it. It's a job that I feel God gave me, as I did not apply for it and (I assume) they got my information because they were really seeking someone for the job. It should fill out most, if not all of my work study hours, and I may end up doing the same work for other departments. I have paperwork that I filled out and must drop off on Monday. Then, hopefully, I can start on Tuesday or Wednesday of this upcoming week. Which, hopefully, means I will be getting my first paycheck in a couple of weeks. This is very good because my checking account is all but depleted entirely due to the fact that I just paid $300 of my tuition. It's amazing how God works in our lives. I feel blessed.

Last night I went to a Jeremy Camp concert. He was awesome live. I had heard mixed opinions on his live show and wasn't quite sure what to expect. He put on a heckuva unplugged concert. I'd definitely go see him live again. The only disappointment of the evening was the fact that, for whatever reason, Mainstay did not show up. They were supposed to be the openers, but instead this other artist played in their place. I have no idea what happened, but it was upsetting to my niece who is probably the biggest Mainstay fan ever. Oh well.

The next few weeks will probably be busy. There's tests, mid-term exams, the end of a class (Unix), my new job and my 19th birthday. But I'm looking forward to it all.

tigerfan88 · 10-01-2007, 01:57 PM

Another week has come and passed and it's been interesting.

School continues to go well. I'm making good grades and enjoying it, though it gets annoying having to wake up at 8AM Monday, Wednesday and Friday. By Thursday, I'm ready for the week to be over with.

This week is going to be busy for me. I have a Calc test Wednesday, Logic homework to do, research to do for my essay, a musical composition, and two computer assignments. The Calc test is very important, as if I do not get a good grade on it, I will probably drop the class for now.

Personal-wise, things are going very well. I just got back from a weekend up north, so it was nice to relax with family. I'm very good friends with a guy and we're continuing to just be friends for a bit, but we have a lot in common. It'll be nice to see him soon.

I start my new job shortly, hopefully tomorrow or Wednesday. As soon as they add me into the CMS system, I'll start. So woot!

tigerfan88 · 10-02-2007, 07:47 PM

"Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made know to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

- Phillippians 3:6-7

The above verse is something that really applies to my life right now. I'm currently going through some potential significant changes when it comes to my Major. I've come to the conclusion that I don't want to do Computer Science, but rather Computer Information Systems. I don't want to be a Software Engineer, but rather a Systems Analyst. I don't want to take a lot of Science and Math classes, but rather more Business classes. Basically, I know in my heart that I want to switch my Major from CS to CIS.

Tomorrow I have another Calculus test and I absolutely have to do good on it. It's crucial. If I don't do good on it, I will probably drop the class (and thus pay for a class I did not keep) and then take a lighter Calculus class in the Winter. But the thing is, I don't want to waste my money. As much as I loathe Calculus, as much as it's putting stress on me, I don't want to drop the class. But I realize that maybe it's God's will that I completely give up on it and then do a lighter class later on.

What's discouraging, to me, is that my academic adviser has told me to tough it out and stick with CS. But I don't want to. I've done my research and, as far as I can tell, CIS is pretty employable, provided you get an internship, which I should. I just wish there were more encouragement from people around me that switching is the right thing to do.

Right now, I have a lot of stuff due and it's kinda stressful. I'm trying so hard to make good grades in all my subjects and live up to the expectations I know some people have for me and the ones I have for myself. What's difficult is learning to let go of all of this and trust in God. It's not easy to stop worrying about things and completely let it rest in God's hands. But these two verses remind me that this is exactly what I have to do. I need to take a deep breath, relax, pray and allow God to do His will in my life. And I'm still learning how to do that.

tigerfan88 · 10-07-2007, 07:55 PM

Well, I gotta praise God for getting me through another busy, difficult week. I ended up bettering my Calculus grade by 11 points, which is awesome. I will now be able to keep the class and once I'm done with the semester, I should be done with math for good. Yes!

I didn't get quite as great of a grade with my Logic homework, though. But I do get to drop 2 homeworks off my grade, so I'm still alright as far as that goes. I have a Logic midterm on Wednesday which is making me nervous, but I should do alright with it since I do understand all the concepts and am pretty decent at Logic.

Tonight I'm working on finishing a rough draft of an English paper to turn into my Professor tomorrow so that he can give me feedback on what to change before I turn it in for grading early next week. I also need to write a few articles for a freelance project I'm trying to finish up.

Tomorrow I have Calc class, then Logic and after that, I'm heading to Grand Rapids, MI for WWE Raw. My brother is a lawyer and his firm has a skybox suite for events at Van Andel Arena. Pretty awesome, huh? Did I mention that it's free? So I'll be spending the night at my brother's house before coming back Tuesday afternoon for classes. It should be fun.

tigerfan88 · 10-09-2007, 11:05 PM

Last night was fun! We were treated to lots of good, free food. The suite was very nice--had a plasma TV, fridge stocked with beer (not that I had any), pop, water, you name it and a private restroom. We could either stay in the suite or go out on the balcony and watch the event. We did a little of both. Afterwards, my parents and I crashed at my bro's house before leaving this morning and driving all the way back here.

I had classes today. They were pretty easy, a little boring, a little interesting. In English class, we discussed a Stephen King essay. Fun. Tomorrow is my big Logic midterm test, something I am very nervous about. However, I know God is gonna pull me through it, so I can take solace in that.

tigerfan88 · 10-14-2007, 12:21 AM

Another busy week is over with, but next week is gonna be even busier. I have a final in a computer class, a Calculus test, a midterm in my Programming class, Logic and Music homework due and an English essay due. But, hopefully, after this next week is done, I can relax a little.

I did come to the conclusion today that I waste a lot of time. It's true that I have 16 credit hours and have a lot of things to study for, but there should still be time for me to read my Bible and play my guitar--two things I have neglected since the start of college. I usually end up spending too much time goofing off on the computer, occasionally talking to friends on there. I now know that I need to cease this and better manage my available time. Hopefully that way I can continue to keep up with my studies while also having time to actually have, you know, fun. So I think that's going to be a goal of mine over the next few weeks.

**RK_lover** · 10-14-2007, 09:02 PM

I've had the same issue of time-management; I guess it's normal then!

What's your favorite class so far? I like my comp class, surprisingly, is my favorite so far.

Sayonara!

tigerfan88 · 10-15-2007, 01:32 PM

Oh, man, it's a toss up between Qbasic Programming, English and Fundamentals of Music. But if I had to choose, I'd probably pick Qbasic. The assignments are easy so far, but it's fun to be able to learn stuff and then apply it to solve problems. Although my professor for English is awesome. You have a favorite Prof?

Time management is tough, but it oughta get a ton easier for me, since I'm dropping Calculus I (I don't like the professor and his rules, nor the textbook we use), so I'll be back down to 12 credit hours. I guess it's all about just getting up and getting it done, then using the left over time to have fun. Easy concept, except I'm prone to having fun first, then studying later.