[BurntHombre]

Okay, change mine from "cons" to "trials" too.

(Still not sure what the distinction is.)

Oh, I thought of another con trial: Getting anywhere on time requires a lot more foreplanning and preparation than it used to.

[loriborealis]

Does anyone find that after having kids, time spent with your spouse (or even your relationship with your spouse) is strained? I'd say that would be a con/trial/negative. You no longer get unlimited free reign of your spouse's time and attention and love. And that's something I cherish.

[Gracie Love]

Originally Posted by BurntHombre

Okay, change mine from "cons" to "trials" too.

(Still not sure what the distinction is.)

Oh, I thought of another con trial: Getting anywhere on time requires a lot more foreplanning and preparation than it used to.

In my house even with much foreplanning and telling everybody that we have to be there 30 minutes earlier than we do we still show up late. And I am one of those people that hates to be late.

[Gracie Love]

Originally Posted by loriborealis

Does anyone find that after having kids, time spent with your spouse (or even your relationship with your spouse) is strained? I'd say that would be a con/trial/negative. You no longer get unlimited free reign of your spouse's time and attention and love. And that's something I cherish.

It is just a challenge. When they are babies it is the hardest, but it gets better with time. It is starting to get better with Ethan. Matthew knows that when we close the door it is best to leave us alone. Ethan on the other hand sees it as a challenge.

[3e3c3e]

Only being a parent for 6 months I can only comment a little:

Joys are so many it truly is impossible to name them all. Every moment with them is really a blessing. No matter how bad my day is at work - I feel 100% better when I walk through the door and see my family.

Trails - the only one I can say so far was the lack of sleep the first few months. We where up a lot caring for the 2 guys. But after a few months that slowly stopped.


~3e3c3e

[0h_Gracie]

Thank you Nate for suggesting that this thread be called the "joys and trials" rather than the "pros and cons". I also think it's more appropriate.

Having and raising children has, and still is, by far the most challenging thing I've ever had to do. But at the same time, the blessings surpass any compensation, benefit, accolade or reward I have ever recieved for anything I've done or accomplished. There is nothing sweeter than having those little arms wrap around you, those little fingers grab you, and that little voice say "I love you. You're the best mom I've ever had." Wait, I correct myself. It's even sweeter when they do this as a young adult.

I remember when my oldest daughter was about 6 months old, and I was at a friends house and was holding her up in front of me, smiling at her, making those baby noises, bouncing her up and down as she cooed and laughed. My friend's husband, watching us, said to me, "Did you ever think it was possible to love someone so much?" Boy did he hit the nail on the head. And no, I never did.

That's what having children is all about. Loving someone so much, that your heart can ache until you think the pain will crush you, and at the same time, your heart can be so full of joy you feel you will burst and your cheeks hurt because you can't seem to wipe the smile off of your face. Also, being so humbled, because God has placed these precious little people in your care, to nourish, comfort, teach, and prepare them to know and walk with their heavenly Father.

Taking care of them is hard work, not just physically, but intellectually and emotionally as well. But that's what all relationships are made of, hard work and sacrifice. God's relationship to us, being the ultimate example.

There are no cons to having children. There are trials, there can be pain, and yes, there is a lot of stretching of ones own self. But it is definitely more than worth it.